How do you get back on your feet when you are an adult orphan that may be having money problems and you have no one to help you. i want to give my advice of how you can get your life in order.
1. Learn from your mistakes. Don't trust everyone. Be very selective. Lookout for yourself. You don't have a family to back you up. Realize where things went wrong. If you could go back what would you have done differently? Now don't ever make that mistake again.
2. Be independent. I know as orphans we want a family. We want to be taken care of. But in this world we really have to be adults. We need to be able to always have a back up plan. Have money saved up in case something happens. Don't have everything in your life be dependent on someone else. Don't have all your hopes be dependent on someone else. Don't fall apart just because someone doesn't want to be with you anymore. Have all your hopes be dependent on yourself and what you are going to accomplish in life. Also don't let someone be dependent on you. Don't drive them to work or give them money. Make them get a job and get their own car. They are the ones with parents, make them grow up. Why should they have it easy? I have a 40 year old cousin who still lives with his mom. What a dork. Grow up! If you are dependent on someone else for help then they can take advantage of you and control you. You are at their mercy. You don't want that. You want to be in control. If someone is dependent on you, they are still taking advantage of you and stealing from you. They are using you. Don't let them.
2. Set goals in life. This will help you move forward and help you organize your life. You may need to get out of debt. You may want to get a good job. Get a new car, a better house, start a family etc. Write these goals down and plan on how you are going to accomplish them.
3. Get out of Debt. Get a job and start making payments on your debt. Pay off that credit card and never use it again. Pay off a little bit of your debt each month. If you aren't making enough money to do that try getting some extra work on the side. If you are a graphic artist try doing some freelance work to make some extra money. If you are photogenic try some modeling. Some one may need an article written, or someone may need some snow shoveled. I have even seen a help wanted ad that said "Get paid to wave". Anyone could do that. You can do these odd jobs on your days off or after your usual job. Always check Craigslist.com and look for some extra work for make you some extra money. Look under the "Gigs" listing. You may even come across a job offer thats even better than what you have now.
4. Get a family. I think perhaps the easiest way for finding a family or at least a place where it is like a family is a church. Not all churches are the same. Some are really messed up. I don't have anything to do with the church because I know there is no way they could ever accept me. But for some this may help. Its a good place to meet friends and perhaps a future spouse. If you have no luck with a church try a local group. Like a book club where a small group of people meet each week at the library or a volunteer group that helps the community. I have found this step to be somewhat difficult. But keep looking and researching. Try using your hobbies as help to find groups that have similar interests. If I come up with any more Ideas I will post them I promise.
5. Move on. Don't let the past hold you back. You may think of things of the past every now and then but don't let it get to you. Look a head to the future and plan to make your life better. Remember to not make the same mistakes you made in the past.
I hope these tips have helped. I will be posting some more articles on related topics. Remember most people who have a family never seem to really grow up. They always have someone to help them. They seem to take advantage of others and always need to be baby-ed. But adult orphans have to grow up. We need to be prepared for anything that happens in life.
Sunday, December 27, 2009
How to get over a breakup
1. One thing I do when I guy leaves me is I take a piece of paper and write down all of the reasons why he is a loser. For example he may drink too much, or he smells, he cheats, he has no money, he lives with his mom, he never calls, he is ugly, he didn't like my art etc. There are so many reasons. Then you realize you deserve better. When ever you start to miss him or think of him just read that list and remember how better off you are without him/her.
2. Never give second chances. I never do. Why? Did you not learn your lesson the first time? If he didn't do it right the first time why give him a second chance? No one ever gives me a second chance.
3. Improve yourself. Sometimes when someone get s divorce or goes through a break up they take it personally and just fall apart. Their place falls apart and they just fall apart. They become a loser. Why do that? Make yourself better? Make then wish they hadn't left you. Dress better, work harder at your job, clean your house, save more money, get a hair cut, improve yourself. Make progress. Become stronger. Don't look back.
4. Eat healthy and work out. This will make you feel better. Instead of ice cream try a fruit salad, or some strawberry yogurt. Take a walk outside. Visit a health club. You may meet someone.
5. I love watching funny movies after a break up. Its so nice to laugh when that jerk is gone. Try watching some funny movies. I remember watching Vampires Kiss a year ago when a guy left me. The dvd came in the mail the day he broke up with me. Sweet.
Just don't let yourself fall apart. Don't cry over a loser and learn from it. Yes it is nice to have someone to hang out with and enjoy being with but a persons happiness should be completely dependent on someone who treats you like crap.
2. Never give second chances. I never do. Why? Did you not learn your lesson the first time? If he didn't do it right the first time why give him a second chance? No one ever gives me a second chance.
3. Improve yourself. Sometimes when someone get s divorce or goes through a break up they take it personally and just fall apart. Their place falls apart and they just fall apart. They become a loser. Why do that? Make yourself better? Make then wish they hadn't left you. Dress better, work harder at your job, clean your house, save more money, get a hair cut, improve yourself. Make progress. Become stronger. Don't look back.
4. Eat healthy and work out. This will make you feel better. Instead of ice cream try a fruit salad, or some strawberry yogurt. Take a walk outside. Visit a health club. You may meet someone.
5. I love watching funny movies after a break up. Its so nice to laugh when that jerk is gone. Try watching some funny movies. I remember watching Vampires Kiss a year ago when a guy left me. The dvd came in the mail the day he broke up with me. Sweet.
Just don't let yourself fall apart. Don't cry over a loser and learn from it. Yes it is nice to have someone to hang out with and enjoy being with but a persons happiness should be completely dependent on someone who treats you like crap.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Cruelty-Free Shampoos and Conditioners
I wanted to make it easier for people to find and have access to products that do not do animal testing. Most are hard to find in stores. Some well-known ones are Avon, Revlon (they don't do animal testing anymore), Shaklee, and Arbonne. Revlon has a brand of Shampoo called Flex. I hope to do more blogs on other products that are cruelty-free like makeup, etc.
Arbonne, Avon and Shaklee sell a lot of cometics. You should look into that. Avon also makes St. Ives produst which can be found in stores. My biggest problem is trying to find a cruelty-free shampoo that matches my bathroom. Also make sure to visit www.peta.org to find a list of more companies that don't do animal testing.
Arbonne, Avon and Shaklee sell a lot of cometics. You should look into that. Avon also makes St. Ives produst which can be found in stores. My biggest problem is trying to find a cruelty-free shampoo that matches my bathroom. Also make sure to visit www.peta.org to find a list of more companies that don't do animal testing.
Friday, December 18, 2009
List of Famous Orphans
List of Famous Orphans
Classical and religious scriptural
Aristotle, Greek philosopher and scientist, orphaned in early childhood.
Cyrus the Great, Persian emperor, orphaned in childhood.
Moses, major prophet in Christianity, Islam, and Judaism, orphaned as an infant.
Muhammad, central figure in Islam, orphaned at age 6.
Romulus and Remus, traditional founders of ancient Rome, orphaned in infancy.
Political
Andrew JacksonAlexander Hamilton, U.S. founding father, orphaned at age 13.
Ben W. Hooper, governor of Tennessee, 1911 to 1915, raised in an orphanage.
Herbert Hoover, U.S. president, orphaned at age 9.
Andrew Jackson, U.S. president, orphaned at age 14.
Edward Langworthy, U.S. patriot and founding father, raised in an orphanage.
Nelson Mandela, president of South Africa, raised as a ward.
Eleanor Roosevelt, U.S. First Lady, civil-rights activist, orphaned at age 10.
Bertrand Russell, political philosopher, orphaned at age 3.
Jean-Jacques Rousseau, political philosopher, raised by aunt and uncle.
Tecumseh, Native American leader, orphaned as a child.
Tom Vilsack, U.S. Secretary of Agriculture, former Iowa governor, adopted at birth.
Malcolm X, political and civil rights activist, raised in an orphanage and foster care.
Authors and poets
Leo TolstoyEdward Albee, playwright, adopted as an infant.
John Keats, poet, raised partly by his grandmother.
W. Somerset Maugham, author, orphaned in childhood.
James Michener, author, adopted as an infant.
Edgar Allan Poe, author, orphaned in childhood.
J. R. R. Tolkien, author, orphaned at age 12.
Leo Tolstoy, author, orphaned at age 9.
Henry Morton Stanley, journalist, explorer, raised in a workhouse.
Dale Wasserman, playwright, orphaned at age 9.
William Wordsworth, poet, orphaned at age 12.
Arts, entertainment, sports
Ella FitzgeraldLouis Armstrong, musician, raised in an orphanage and by his grandmother.
Johann Sebastian Bach, composer, orphaned at age 9.
Tallulah Bankhead, actress, orphaned as an infant.
Ingrid Bergman, actress, orphaned at age 12.
Carol Burnett, entertainer, raised by her grandmother.
Ray Charles, singer, orphaned at age 15.
Henry Darger, artist whose work focused on orphans.
Ice-T, rapper, actor, orphaned aged 9.
Juliette Drouet, actress, orphaned in childhood.
Ella Fitzgerald, singer, orphaned in childhood.
Samuel Goldwyn, film mogul, raised by relatives.
James Hetfield, singer, ophaned by cancer at 16.
Faith Hill, singer, adopted as an infant.
Billie Holiday, singer, intermittently abandoned in childhood.
John Lennon, musician, raised by his aunt and uncle.
George Lopez, comedian,raised by a grandmother.
Frances McDormand, best actress Academy Award winner, adopted as an infant.
Marilyn Monroe, entertainer, raised in foster care.
Babe Ruth, baseball star, raised in an orphanage.
Bessie Smith, singer, orphaned at age 9.
Barbara Stanwyck, actress, raised in foster homes from age 2.
Trent Reznor, orphaned when parents abandoned him at age 5 and raised by grandparents.
Jeordie White, of Marilyn Manson band, orphaned by father as an infant.
Art Clokey, creator of Gumby. Father died and mother abandoned him at age 11.
Science and business
George Washington CarverGeorge Washington Carver, scientist, inventor, orphaned while a slave.
Steven Paul Jobs, Apple Computer founder and executive, orphaned as infant.
Johannes Kepler, scientist, raised by grandmother.
Percy Spencer, inventor, orphaned in childhood.
Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy's restaurants, adopted as an infant.
Classical and religious scriptural
Aristotle, Greek philosopher and scientist, orphaned in early childhood.
Cyrus the Great, Persian emperor, orphaned in childhood.
Moses, major prophet in Christianity, Islam, and Judaism, orphaned as an infant.
Muhammad, central figure in Islam, orphaned at age 6.
Romulus and Remus, traditional founders of ancient Rome, orphaned in infancy.
Political
Andrew JacksonAlexander Hamilton, U.S. founding father, orphaned at age 13.
Ben W. Hooper, governor of Tennessee, 1911 to 1915, raised in an orphanage.
Herbert Hoover, U.S. president, orphaned at age 9.
Andrew Jackson, U.S. president, orphaned at age 14.
Edward Langworthy, U.S. patriot and founding father, raised in an orphanage.
Nelson Mandela, president of South Africa, raised as a ward.
Eleanor Roosevelt, U.S. First Lady, civil-rights activist, orphaned at age 10.
Bertrand Russell, political philosopher, orphaned at age 3.
Jean-Jacques Rousseau, political philosopher, raised by aunt and uncle.
Tecumseh, Native American leader, orphaned as a child.
Tom Vilsack, U.S. Secretary of Agriculture, former Iowa governor, adopted at birth.
Malcolm X, political and civil rights activist, raised in an orphanage and foster care.
Authors and poets
Leo TolstoyEdward Albee, playwright, adopted as an infant.
John Keats, poet, raised partly by his grandmother.
W. Somerset Maugham, author, orphaned in childhood.
James Michener, author, adopted as an infant.
Edgar Allan Poe, author, orphaned in childhood.
J. R. R. Tolkien, author, orphaned at age 12.
Leo Tolstoy, author, orphaned at age 9.
Henry Morton Stanley, journalist, explorer, raised in a workhouse.
Dale Wasserman, playwright, orphaned at age 9.
William Wordsworth, poet, orphaned at age 12.
Arts, entertainment, sports
Ella FitzgeraldLouis Armstrong, musician, raised in an orphanage and by his grandmother.
Johann Sebastian Bach, composer, orphaned at age 9.
Tallulah Bankhead, actress, orphaned as an infant.
Ingrid Bergman, actress, orphaned at age 12.
Carol Burnett, entertainer, raised by her grandmother.
Ray Charles, singer, orphaned at age 15.
Henry Darger, artist whose work focused on orphans.
Ice-T, rapper, actor, orphaned aged 9.
Juliette Drouet, actress, orphaned in childhood.
Ella Fitzgerald, singer, orphaned in childhood.
Samuel Goldwyn, film mogul, raised by relatives.
James Hetfield, singer, ophaned by cancer at 16.
Faith Hill, singer, adopted as an infant.
Billie Holiday, singer, intermittently abandoned in childhood.
John Lennon, musician, raised by his aunt and uncle.
George Lopez, comedian,raised by a grandmother.
Frances McDormand, best actress Academy Award winner, adopted as an infant.
Marilyn Monroe, entertainer, raised in foster care.
Babe Ruth, baseball star, raised in an orphanage.
Bessie Smith, singer, orphaned at age 9.
Barbara Stanwyck, actress, raised in foster homes from age 2.
Trent Reznor, orphaned when parents abandoned him at age 5 and raised by grandparents.
Jeordie White, of Marilyn Manson band, orphaned by father as an infant.
Art Clokey, creator of Gumby. Father died and mother abandoned him at age 11.
Science and business
George Washington CarverGeorge Washington Carver, scientist, inventor, orphaned while a slave.
Steven Paul Jobs, Apple Computer founder and executive, orphaned as infant.
Johannes Kepler, scientist, raised by grandmother.
Percy Spencer, inventor, orphaned in childhood.
Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy's restaurants, adopted as an infant.
10 Ways to Cope with Grief
Keanu Reeves once said "Grief changes shape, but it never ends". I believe that to be true. We will never forget the loved ones we have lost but we need to learn to manage the grief so we can keep going in life and make things easier for us. Since I have been an orphan for over 10 years I will try to give you my best advice on the matter.
1. Get a hobby or two if you don't already have one. I know this sounds cheesey and it seems like you are running from the pain but your will come across triggers of grief many times in the future and then you can grieve. One shouldn't have to always feel the pain of losing a loved one. I think it is healthy to try to enjoy things in life. A hobby also can create goals and achievements in life. Things that would have made your loved one proud. I like to find ways of saving money. I know that would have made my mom proud. It also makes life easier for me. Also blogging to help others is a hobby that would have made her proud. Maybe do some volunteer work, write something, plant something...
2. Try watching a movie. Beware that some movies have emotional triggers and can make your pain worse. Try something comical that would make you laugh. I love vampire comedies. Don't let movie watching become an addiction. Its just something nice to past the time and put your mind at ease.
3. Keeping a journal helps. I have kept various journals since a year after my mom died. Its also nice to look back and see how things were a week or a year before. You can write about how you feel. If you are starting to not feel so on edge and maybe see what may cause emotional triggers. (a trigger is something that reminds you of your loved one consciously or subconsciously and causes you to become upset. Sometimes it can be a song, or what someone wore or even a time of year.)
4. Pick out a book to read. Its like the opposite of having a journal. It passes the time and keeps your mind occupied. And instead of putting things down on paper you are picking things up off of paper. Maybe a biography. I always love learning about other people and their lives. I always keep an emergency unread book around just in case I get lonely and kinda freak out if you know what I mean. And a library card doesn't cost anything.
5. Hang out with friends and family. It will keep your mind on other things and you will be surrounded by people who care about you. Maybe go camping, fishing, or go to a concert. Maybe a TINY bit of shopping wouldn't hurt. Wash your car, walk the dog.
6. Eat healthy. Going through the loss of a loved one can take a toll on you emotionally and your immune system can be weakened temporarily. Eating healthy will help you feel better and keep you from getting sick. If you are crying a lot drink lots of water. You don't want to get dehydrated and get sick.
7. Go see a counselor. There are lots of people who would loved to have someone to talk to but don't have anyone or can't afford it. Some people went to college just to be able to help you in your situation. Take advantage of that. There are hotlines that you can call also. You deserve to have someone to talk to.
8. If you start to cry in public, try to go to the restroom and sit and relax and take a deep breath. If you cry too hard it can hurt you physically. Its okay to cry a little. Understand that someone loses a loved one each day. Maybe try calling up a friend to talk to. Again drink lots of water. When you are dehydrated it will also cause headaches.
9. Try to see the good in the tragedy. Yes, it is obvious that a tragedy is a terrible thing. But great things can come from pain. If I weren't an orphan I wouldn't care at all about my own kind. At least not as much as I do now. But I do care and I want to help them and make life easier for them. If you can't see the good...then make the good. If you lost someone to cancer then try telling others about the dangers of cancer and maybe donate to help cancer research.
10. Pray. Even though life has been hard for me I am still gonna wait until the last minute to take my anger out on God. Maybe there is some good reason why it all happened the way it did. But why not talk to God? Mom is up there with Him now anyways. Or at least try talking to your loved one. This can be very hard. Sometimes its just easier to talk to the Man upstairs.
Well there is 10 ways to help with grieving. I hope I helped someone. We are all going through this together and we gotta help each other. We shouldn't have hard lives just because we loved and lost someone. Plus we may see them again.
1. Get a hobby or two if you don't already have one. I know this sounds cheesey and it seems like you are running from the pain but your will come across triggers of grief many times in the future and then you can grieve. One shouldn't have to always feel the pain of losing a loved one. I think it is healthy to try to enjoy things in life. A hobby also can create goals and achievements in life. Things that would have made your loved one proud. I like to find ways of saving money. I know that would have made my mom proud. It also makes life easier for me. Also blogging to help others is a hobby that would have made her proud. Maybe do some volunteer work, write something, plant something...
2. Try watching a movie. Beware that some movies have emotional triggers and can make your pain worse. Try something comical that would make you laugh. I love vampire comedies. Don't let movie watching become an addiction. Its just something nice to past the time and put your mind at ease.
3. Keeping a journal helps. I have kept various journals since a year after my mom died. Its also nice to look back and see how things were a week or a year before. You can write about how you feel. If you are starting to not feel so on edge and maybe see what may cause emotional triggers. (a trigger is something that reminds you of your loved one consciously or subconsciously and causes you to become upset. Sometimes it can be a song, or what someone wore or even a time of year.)
4. Pick out a book to read. Its like the opposite of having a journal. It passes the time and keeps your mind occupied. And instead of putting things down on paper you are picking things up off of paper. Maybe a biography. I always love learning about other people and their lives. I always keep an emergency unread book around just in case I get lonely and kinda freak out if you know what I mean. And a library card doesn't cost anything.
5. Hang out with friends and family. It will keep your mind on other things and you will be surrounded by people who care about you. Maybe go camping, fishing, or go to a concert. Maybe a TINY bit of shopping wouldn't hurt. Wash your car, walk the dog.
6. Eat healthy. Going through the loss of a loved one can take a toll on you emotionally and your immune system can be weakened temporarily. Eating healthy will help you feel better and keep you from getting sick. If you are crying a lot drink lots of water. You don't want to get dehydrated and get sick.
7. Go see a counselor. There are lots of people who would loved to have someone to talk to but don't have anyone or can't afford it. Some people went to college just to be able to help you in your situation. Take advantage of that. There are hotlines that you can call also. You deserve to have someone to talk to.
8. If you start to cry in public, try to go to the restroom and sit and relax and take a deep breath. If you cry too hard it can hurt you physically. Its okay to cry a little. Understand that someone loses a loved one each day. Maybe try calling up a friend to talk to. Again drink lots of water. When you are dehydrated it will also cause headaches.
9. Try to see the good in the tragedy. Yes, it is obvious that a tragedy is a terrible thing. But great things can come from pain. If I weren't an orphan I wouldn't care at all about my own kind. At least not as much as I do now. But I do care and I want to help them and make life easier for them. If you can't see the good...then make the good. If you lost someone to cancer then try telling others about the dangers of cancer and maybe donate to help cancer research.
10. Pray. Even though life has been hard for me I am still gonna wait until the last minute to take my anger out on God. Maybe there is some good reason why it all happened the way it did. But why not talk to God? Mom is up there with Him now anyways. Or at least try talking to your loved one. This can be very hard. Sometimes its just easier to talk to the Man upstairs.
Well there is 10 ways to help with grieving. I hope I helped someone. We are all going through this together and we gotta help each other. We shouldn't have hard lives just because we loved and lost someone. Plus we may see them again.
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