Monday, June 28, 2010

Dating Tips for Orphan Women

I will evetually post on dating tips for orphaned men. But I think orphan women really need help in this area. Having a man in a womans life can make things SO much easier. So I wanted to give a few tips for orphans and dating etc.

1. No Drama. Men hate drama. I used to think it was okay to tell a guy all about my dead mom and how I am an orphan etc. No. Men don't like akward uncomfortable situtations like that. So no drama. No bitching. No being negative. No complaining that he isn't spending time with you. Sometimes men actually are busy. Don't harrass him. Don't text him all the time. Sometimes stop texting or calling him and wait til he calls you. This way you know he is thinking about you and it helps him think you are drama-free. Its also playing hard-to-get. These things will be very important if he breaks up with you. I will post on break up tips later. You won't want to miss it!

2. Be positive. Men like girls who are happy and fun. Always have something positive to say. It you text him. Say something positive and not negative. Don't say "oh I hate my job" but instead say "I can't wait til lunch". If you have a Twitter, Myspace or facebook make sure to have your status and tweets be fun and happy things. "I went shopping today" or "I love my kitty". Get the idea. Being fun can make a guy want to be with you. Men like girls who smile and laugh and are fun. I know it sounds cheesy but its true. Make sure to smile in your photos on your facebook etc. Even if you want a sexy photo..make sure you have a slight smile on your face. No sad stuff. This also goes along with being confident.

3. Don't tell him about your orphan hood. Atleast not until you really have to. I always wondered what would happen if I didn't tell a guy the truth about my dead mom etc. And guess what...he stuck around. Most guys run from drama and sad stuff. They don't know how to handle it. I recently met up with a guy at the mall. And I mentioned to him that my mom has passed away. I mention it twice and both times he changed the subject right away. He may be afraid I might cry or that he might cry. It was kinda a bad move on my part. I'll keep you posted on this subject. But until then my advice is don't tell him any of the personal orphan stuff. By not telling him about it...he can make up stuff in his mind that you are perfect. And by the time you do have to tell him...hopefully he won't care.

4. Don't be too easy. Be confident and show restraint. Don't call all the time. Wait and see if he calls you sometimes. Spend time apart. Make him think you have a life. And make him want to be a part of it. Not being easy also goes along with not being too clingy.

5. If he breaks up with you don't freak out. Refer to tip #1. Again I will post more on this later.

6. Be confident. Even if you don't feel like it. Do it! Stand up straight, smile, and be happy. I'm still working on this.

7. Don't be clingy. Orphan females tend to be very clingy. If a guy breaks up with her or doesn't spend enough time with her...she freaks out. We panic and feel alone and not in control. You need to calm down and don't be clingy. Or you will lose him. Give him some space and show him that you can be independant even if you feel like you want to call him like crazy.

8. If you are going to meet him in person for the first time, dress really nice. Don't think that he will accept you for who you are and wear whatever. If you don't give a good first impression then there will be no second chance. I have had this happen a lot. But I am learning. Dress cute, make sure you don't wear anything that makes you look fat. Like when I met this guy at the mall. I wore a hoodie over a cute tight shirt...well that hoodie made me look fat. I should have wore a cute tank top.

9. Never talk about ex-boyfriends. Even if you are making a point. Don't do it. Just don't. You don't want to hear about his ex-girlfriends, do you? NOPE! So don't talk about your ex-boyfriends.

10. Don't let him know that you don't have a dad. He will treat you like crap. He will break up with you in the worst way cus he knows your dad isn't gonna protect you. He will take what he wants from you and then leave you. Just say you dad travels a lot or something. Or talk about your bog brother and how he looks out for you. This is a tricky one but very important.

I hope some of this helps I will post more on it soon. I am just learning things myself too.


Anonymous said...

What a load of fucking bullshit. Get a grip you stupid girl.

The Relationship Company said...

Just wanted to say.. great post.........

d said...

this is sad but true. have thought about this idea of not revealing the past a lot lately, not sure it's sustainable however. people judge you when you tell them this kind of stuff. then i feel like i have to make sure they are comfortable, like its more difficult for them. sounds like you struck a nerve with old Anonymous i said, people judge.

Jennifer said...

Funny, I have lived by these same rules (except for #8) and in the exact same number of importance. Sounds strange, but I have never met another orphan to share "field studies" with.

Kinky said...

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Starshelter said...

I've been following your blog for a while and first of all my heart goes out to you. I'm so proud of you (without sounding cheesy), I really am.

I could really use your help with an orphan related project but not sure how to get in touch.
You rank really high!

I'm part of Across The Horizon and I was an orphan at 14.

Please read the directives and send an e-mail. Send it attn Starshelter to

Thanks and I hope you read this... Don't ever let negative comments get to... Be like the Hulk who absorbs neg energy and uses it... Grows and grows.

Anonymous said...

Wow. Have you ever considered cheering the fuck up? It's sad when someone you love dies, and if you lose your parents or whatever, but really that should just give you the drive to get the hell on with life and stop moping around, complaining about everything. I don't think people mind knowing that you're an orphan, they just don't like being reminded of it every two seconds.
Also if you don't know your dad, he could still be alive, so you aren't really an orphan, and shouldn't post on your own blog. I suggest you start trying to kiss your own ass.
Lots of love,

White dating said...

Dating again after getting a divorce. You've probably been disappointed in the way that things turned out with your marriage and sometimes this can build up scars and thoughts about dating that are not too pleasant.

Mihai said...

I am 51 years old man and I will never hide my real existence for try to find a princes to try construct real love with her, and even I am orphan from little chilhood I do not stop to believe in true love who can be created just with woman and man but, if there not exist a princes for me, I can't judge God or people for do not give my chance for try to construct with her true love. I am ready and I was all the time to not be tired to love for ever because I learn what does mean existence of humankind on this ostile Universe and if people choose to not believe in construct real love it's with them to believe to live just in liar poesie and just pay taxes toghether's conditioned by this SYSTEM who stole from all peple real feelings to create energy and to feel live real life with love. Many friends tell me what I am looking for is not real I try to explain to me I will never find a princes for me with this aspect to see what happend arround me on this World. But with this all kindness from my friend's and with all advice's from you and from all of the World people I will never stop to believe and do not be tired to encourage my princes to believe in real love even for eternity because I will tell you something, in fact what are we going to do on our life's and on this Universe, to be just good for pay taxes and to be like Dinosaur's just another some kind of specie living conditionated by one System life or by one political System to serve them for pay TAXES? I said NO all the time when I feel people hide their pain with this fact. I know, I-m taken like jerk but never stop to believe in what does mean man and woman can be more like just pay taxes but they can give from their true love to this Universe most beatiful's sentiments and created the best ENERGY of material and imaterial Universe. Maybe, we humans, have just one life each, but I think it's not enough just simple live and die with out feel we can feel this empty Universe with our love our true love what does mean, a real existence for all thing's and for ever because our emotion's it's flours and existence of true Life in eternity. If I go to forward check your motive of existence life.
Do not be sad because of anonymousou can't use bad words in your blog because are many people who love very much their family and they idolatrize if it was god and give each and other all the time love and afection.

Mihai said...

or another's who do not have any experience like that because teir experience it's limited in that case and do not feel another experience but y because they have another's life then us. I was abandoned from maternity and wasn't love by woman in 51 years and I was used to be piece of revenge from one woman and her family because she do not accept mariage of she mother and second father and for revenge use me like a jerk and even I understand that action she got childrens with me and I stay 18 years and support terror from her because she want to kill the childre's even I do not mention never the issue with the revenge and after all she divorce few years ago because she told me it was just for revenge with her mother and her second father it was daing and do not me for revenge anymore. The children's grow up and they are adult now and Iam not afraid more to be killed. I understand from people we orphan's are very naive because we try to have own family because we give valor to this sentiments and to people who love us but we do not find after all just if we got lucky and find someone who give us valor for what we learn from life and if we are better professional that come very great for them and include in their family for ever. Off course, I didn't find yet that family because of liar of ex-woman but I try to hope do not be later I think. I do not care about anymore from bad people from long time ago because they do not have any experience like us and if they have compasion for us it's better to explain them we just don't want to be anymore alone on this World nothing more and do not be use like jerk because we give valor to Family. I do not have ideea if I will find a princes for my heart and construct wth her real love but hope for you to find your love what you try like me more faster then me. Yes, try do not hide your pain because exist peple who have more experince and not just understand us but give us valor and find in us more conselor and try to keep us join them for give them stronger and halty life.

raymondwhite said...

contact me on,i am also an orphanage and i need a good and caring wife who believe marriage is more important in life.

Lux Balder said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

My parents have both passed away. It gives me some comfort that I am not the only one. Some things you wrote might be considered advice for any single woman. I guess guys don't like drama or "bitching". However, I am not one to fake a smile. If I am happy, sad, or angry I show it. I am 34 and single but I hope to one day have a family. I am anonymous but I am not that person who commented earlier.

Vice Admiral Latias said...

Hello! Back for our anual visit! Nice to see you haven't made any changes to this, it's still the appauling, ridiculous, Sexist horseshit that it was this time last year!

Anyway, Merry Christmas to you and your fami..oh.

See you 24/12/13!

Anonymous said...

Wow, you're quite the whiny bitch. You know, when my parents died, I didn't just complain about it, I didn't mope about all day, I got down, and I did some motherfucking pushups. Now I eat punks like you for breakfast, keeping the city streets clean.
Plus I look great in latex.

Anonymous said...

Herro again!

We're back for another Christmas eve message!

Slightly disappointment to see you have not updated in a while. I suppose you have other things to do in life, gotta go fast i suppose. Always remember to Shrek yourself before you wreck yourself.

See you again, On the 24/12/14! Unless, of course you western capitalist pig-dogs surrender to might of North Korea!

Har har har!

Anonymous said...

Jingle bells, jingle bells, you're a whiny slag,
And even if you met your mum she'd disown you, you hag!
Jingle bells, jingle bells, here's some Christmas cheer,
Provided you don't kill yourself we'll both see you next year!
Love you!

Anonymous said...

My idea wife would be an orphan. the primary reason I don't like going to big family functions already so having that double is just a whole other layer of nonsense I'd rather not deal with. Not that I am against family, but If I have to deal with family demands on occasion I'd rather they be mine rather than her's

Bogs Binny said...

مرحبا انا من إيزيس ، يجب عليك الانضمام اليوم و يموت مكافحة الكلاب الخنازير الغربية هاها على أي حال آمل أن تجد نفسك رجل لطيف هذا العام ويمكنك يستقر و ارتداء داخل الحجاب إذا كنت تفكر في رجل نوثر انها الرجم بالنسبة لك !

Just kidding, i'm not really from ISIS. Merry Christmas! I'm back this year again for another message of peace and joy, but first things first - if you meet that Dianna out on your lady adventures ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I heard she's into some messed up stuff...!

Anyway, see you next year!


Your No. 1 Fan said...

This Christmas I'd like to thank you for your blog, and for providing us with a holiday tradition that really puts us in the festive spirit.
It's just a shame that you probably don't have a lot of traditions, what with your dead family and all. Awkward.
Anyway, merry Christmas, and maybe try a new year's resolution of cheering the fuck up a little?

Have a good one!


Chad Thundercock said...

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But, you might be feeling alone this Christmas. Sitting in the cold and dark, with nobody to love you and no presents in sight. Just remember one thing, and one thing only. YOU CAN TUNE IN THIS SATURDAY NIGHT FOR THE WWE SUUUUUUUUUUUUUPERSLAAAAAAAAAAAM, WHERE JOHN CENA FACES THE UNDERTAKER IN THE RING, WILL HE TAKE THE BELT? TUNE IN SATURDAY NIGHT!


Kind Regards, Hope you don't get stoned to death by Isis XOXO

The Ghost of Orphan Christmas Past said...

Merry Christmas!

Nice to see you're updating the blog again, although it's kind of a shame to see that you're still all warped and miserable and shit. I'll give you a little clue, therapy and dealing with your problems =/= hanging around in gay bars trying to get a gay dude to love you.

Anyway, whatever, you do your own thing. Here's to a new year full of new blog posts and all your weird stories, and maybe, if you're lucky, a year of finding your own personal Elton John.

Cheer up you miserable bitch!

SpectralHarambe420 said...

Guess who just got back today?
Them wild-eyed boys that had been away
Haven't changed, haven't much to say
But man, I still think them cats are great

They were asking if you were around
How you was, where you could be found
I told them you were living downtown
Driving all the old men crazy

The boys are back in town

You know the chick that used to dance a lot
Every night she'd be on the floor shaking what she'd got
Man when I tell you she was cool, she was red hot
I mean she was steaming

That time over at Johnny's place
Well this chick got up and she slapped Johnny's face
Man we just fell about the place
If that chick don't want to know, forget her

The boys are back in town [x8]

Spread the word around
The boys are back in town

Friday night they'll be dressed to kill
Down at Dino's bar and grill
The drink will flow and blood will spill
If the boys want to fight, you'd better let them

That jukebox in the corner blasting out my favorite song
The nights are getting warmer, it won't be long
It won't be long till summer comes
Now that the boys are here again

The boys are back in town

Another Christmas Eve, Another shitpost on your surreal blog. Sad to see you haven't updated in quite some time, but tradition is tradition - and we always eagerly await a response! Perhaps you are dead, like everyone favorite gorilla. Where you gunned down in your prime, or did you have information that would lead the arrest of Hillary Clinton? I guess we will never know.

Or perhaps you've traveled the middle east to become culturally enriched and join our brave brothers and sisters in the fight against the western infidels.

Anyway, warmest regards, see you again next year!

Winky face

Ironic Meme Name said...

Hey dude,

Couldn't be bothered to look up your name, sorry. Do you get an email every time someone leaves a comment on this piece of shit blog, or is it something you've just forgotten about that's somehow slipped through the cracks and managed to stay up?

Anyway, let's talk about 2016. It was a pretty rough year all things considered, although what with your parents being dead and all things probably can't get a lot worse for you. We had some good memes too, so that was something. Do you have any exposure to that kind of stuff, or does your spare time consist entirely of moping around like a moody sack of shit?

Trump won, of course. I'm pretty sure you would be one of the people that protested afterwards. I'm not sure exactly where he stands on orphans, but if he wants to build a wall for them too I'm happy to pay for it.

Lots of horrible shit happened too, but I don't really want to make light of that. I don't think it'd do your mood any favours. Anyway here's to a better 2017. Do more blog posts, we're missing out on that quality advice.

Just realised you might have killed yourself and forgotten to delete the blog. If that's the case,
RIP you, Sometime-2017.

Merry Christmas!