Thursday, December 23, 2010

Christmas is almost over!

Just a few more days and we can leave our homes again. I plan on stocking up on some food and getting a few magazines and dvds to watch over the weekend.

New Years shouldn't be too bad. Its not usually a family holiday and people tend to hang with their friends on new years.

This one's been tuff but its almost over!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

A Christmas treat for my Orphans

Follow me on twitter:

Let me know you are following me and I will add you to my best buddy list.

We need to stick together!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Staying busy during the Holidays

Hey guys hope all of you are doing well. I'm posting some reminders and advice for the holidays.

Say no to electric blankets! They are very dangerous. Nuff said.
Try wearing extra layers of clothes while sleeping and hang blankets over windows to keep out the cold. And turn the heater on once in a while. Better to spend a little money on utilities than to freezer or burn.

Stay occupied. Its tuff. I had a friend that was supposed to visit on Thanksgiving. He is still MIA. I have been renting videos from the library.

Also I bought some cheap posters to hang around the living room. The Dalai Lama says to surround yourself by happy images. So I got a few posters of my favorite cartoons. That cheers me up a bit.

I'm also drawing a little. And tweeting on twitter. Its like having friends and its fun.

Also listening to new music can help. Music that doesn't remind of of anything from the past.

Just a few more weeks and it will all be back to normal for the most part.


Is it hard to trust people if they change their opinions about you? If someone's nasty then warm to you, how do you feel about them? also, how easy is it to let ppl in?

Everyone or every orphan is different. I tend to be a anti-social snot. I don't trust people. I think most people are fake. I have noticed a lot of people are mean and then nice. I am sometimes the same way but I act mean because I may be going through a hard time. But other people I have noticed act mean one day just to me and then ACT nice the next day.

Go figure. I don't know what their problem is.

As time goes by I am trusting less and less. I find myself realizing that people are just kinda fake and men are jerks most of the time. Its sad.

But I always say that orphans need to look out for themselves. If people really cared and were trustable then I wouldn't have to save up money incase I get fired. But I have gotten fired without notice before even though my boss knew that I am on my own.

Even friends can have their own agenda. I may hang out with my friends but people will always care more about what they want and themselves than others.

I find it very hard to trust. I just try to look out for myself. All the people that I ever trusted are dead.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

One Year Anniversary of the Orphan Handbook!

Hey guys. I'm sure we have realize yet again how difficult the Holidays are. People with parents seem to just disappear. I had a friend say he was gonna visit me on Thanksgiving week and he never showed up. Other friends who used to text me are no where to be found. Even one of my bosses is home sick with her mom. Gosh I would love to be 50 years old and get to stay home sick with my mom.

I hoping things we get easier in January. Just three weeks away. Untill then I will continue to enjoy movies from the library and home cooked meals with my dog. I'm still having panic attacks and chest pains at work. I hope things get better for all of us.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Orphan update

Thanksgiving wasn't too bad. I stayed in a chilled.

I plan on still taking it even more easy soon and renting more dvds from the library etc.

Light bulb Tips for Orphans

Over Thanksgiving weekend I had a light bulb burn out. The old one was a 60 watt but all I had was 100 watt bulbs. So guess whay this little orphan didn't know? Can I use the 100 watt in place of the 60 watt?

No. I texted a few friends and they are not interchangable.

So 60 watt = 60 watt


100 watt = 100 watt

Otherwise they may over heat, exploded....all that good stuff.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Thanksgiving for Orphans

I've recently read in The Art of Happiness in a Troubled World that people are more likely to be happy when they are around other people. Like in a community. So if you do have friends to hang out with on Thanksgiving you should seriously consider hanging with them around the holidays.

Remember one of the most dangerous times for driving is on Thanksgiving Day. (all those drunks out there). So stay in and stay safe. Also since we orphans don't have much of a family to buy presents and gifts for, take advantage of the opportunity and stay in on Black Friday. It will save you money and stress.

Get a good book from the library to read if you have to stay at home alone over the holidays. Maybe watch some parades on tv or a movie. Stock up on food too so you don't have to go out.

Also remember to enjoy yourself and take it easy. And think of things you are thankful for.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

The Art of Happiness in a Troubled World

I am currently reading The Art of Happiness in a Troubled World and I love it.

In the begining it talks about how to need to be around others and it helps us be happy. I was just thinking of how I miss the community I had in college. Especially in the art building. It also talks about over coming prejudice etc. I haven't finished the book yet but so far it is great. And I totally reccomend it to my fellow orphans.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Another automotive tip for Orphans

Just a side tip for you guys.

Rotate your tires. The New ones go in front. The old tires go in the back. When the rear tires get low buy two new tires. The two new tires go in the front and the ones that were in the front go in the back.

This is called rotating your tires. This way you are less likely to get a flat tire. The better tires are put in the front cus there is more weight put on your front tires when you stop etc. So front tires wear down fast than the rear. Make sense?

Hope this helps. My stupid aunt never taught me this.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Winter Warnings for Orphans

Its that time of year again. Remember to plan for the Holidays. It will get pretty lonely right before Thanksgiving. Soon everyone who has a family will be shopping like crazy. And it will be hard to find someone to hang out with.

Plan your holidays. Don't assume it will be easy.

I plan to get a library card and start visiting the library. Its free and nearby.

Stock up on food and canned goods. The snow storms may keep you in for a while and it may become difficult to get grocieries if the roads are icey.

Keep that gas tank full. Water in the air will condense and freeze if temperatures are below 32 degrees. (which is freezing). And it will hurt your car.

Maybe plan on reading one book a month. Watching one movie a week. Make some art, write a book. Go to a concert. PLAN PLAN PLAN!!!

This is the reason I started this blog was to warn you guys about times like this. The holiday get very lonely. And every year I for get how lonely it gets.

Get a twitter account and follow some interesting people.

Make sure to have your faucet dripping a little or the pipes will freeze.

Use a space heater insead of the internal heater in your home. It will save you money. But keep an eye on that space heater. Make sure there are no newspapers infront of it or anything that could catch fire.

Hang a blanket over the window to keep cold air out and warm air in. Or close blinds etc.

NEVER pour hot water on your car to remove ice. It will break your glass windshield!!! Even cold water may break the glass. Just scrap the ice best you can or stay home.

Never scrap the ice on the painted part of your may end up scratching the paint on your car.

Drive carefully if you don't have anti-lock breaks! YOUR CAR WILL SPIN!. Drive slowly. I stay off the highways.

Stock up on blankets and warn clothes.

So there are some tips for winter. And most of all remember to plan ahead. Make sure you have something to do. YOu don't want to get lonely and sad. I will keep you guys posted. *HUGS*

Death Anniversary

I have noticed that recently I have been having panic attack around February and October. My mom died at the end of October and my Grammy died at the end of February. I wouldn't be surprise if other orphans experience panic attacks around the anniversary of their lost loved one. I tend to be on edge and have chest pains. I hope it ends in December or sooner.

I recommend taking a day off from work or trying to relax. Eat better. Get more sleep. Take it easy. Watch your sodium intake also.

Friday, October 22, 2010

World Trade Center Memorial

Here is an article with some pics on the World Trade Center Memorial.Click here to see article.

They say it may be finished in a year.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Important Cooking Tips

My aunt never taught me how to cook. Turns out if you fry up some bacon it will make lots of grease.

1. Never pour water on hot grease.

2. If you get a grease fire, cover it with a lid. Don't add water.

3. Never pour grease down the drain. Wait til it is cool and scoop it into the trash.
(How the heck were we supposed to know that?)

Just use a damn microwave. EESH!

Also always run the garbage disposal when washing things down the drain. You don't want it to get clogged.

Its really dumb when we get in trouble for not knowing this and its like "hey, so sorry my dead mom didn't tell me this!".

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Learn from Peter Pan

You remember Peter Pan. He was is an orphan and lives in Never Never Land with other orphans who have taken a vow to never grow up. In the story of Peter Pan they can fly. All they need is pixie dust and a happy thought. As long as you keep thinking about your happy thought, you can fly.

I think this is what we need to do when we are sad or even feeling suicidal. We need to think of happy things in life and think of things we want to do in our life. Think of how we want to change our life so it is more enjoyable. And when we keep thinking about our happy thoughts we can fly. But if we don't, we fall and die. Our happy thoughts are our life line. It will keep us alive.

If you keep focusing on the bad things in can't fly. So think of the good things.

On the way to and from work I get upset seeing people driving in and out of nice neighborhoods. I get upset seeing people on their cell phones talking to friends or relatives. But I tried to think going to yardsales with mom, or my dog at home or how I want to move to NY and ride the subway with homeless people.

Never give up and hold on to your happy thought. And make sure to have extra happy thoughts.

Every morning I write down a list of things to be happy about and things that I am looking forward to. You should too.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Survivors Benefits

I found this.
It is about Survivors Benefits. I didn't get any money after my mom died because I guess she didn't work enough. But it could help others who have lost a loved one in certain circumstances.

News and Some Fall Tips

I created another blog. Its just more personal. I hope it may help others cope and survive. Just more personal thoughts rather than articles and tips.

I haven't forgotten you guys. I have been thinking about stuff to post. I will post some stuff later.

This is the time of year when you can save on electricity by not using the heater or air conditioner. Yay!

Also summer clothes are on sale and sandals too. So get some and save them for next year.

The anniversary of my moms death is coming up. So I am just trying to chill if you know what I mean.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

How Grief Rituals Can Offer Comfort

Click here for the article
I wish I could do this. I think its a neato idea. Just passing the article on to you guys. Just click the link above.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Money advice for Orphans

Don't let someone rip you off. You know how you will be at fast food restaurant and they will suggestive sell? Like ask if you want a cookie with that or a drink. They may be making sure they have the order right but it is also known as suggestive selling.

But restaurants aren't the only ones who do this. Mechanics also do this. They suggest that your air filter be replaced or your wipers etc. The air filter may actually need to be replaced but you don't know that. It may be just fine and they want some extra money out of you. So don't always say yes. Don't always trust them. Do your research on how often your air filter etc need to be replaced. And check your wiper blades before you get an oil change so you know what condition they are in. I use mine til they are just a rubber string on a stick.

Also doctors will do this too. Just an extra blood test and then another appointment to follow up and you go in and he says everything is fine. You just paid for a doctors appointment you didn't need. Do you research if you are sick. Eat healthy. It makes me so mad when they need more money and they suggest things that I don't need. If you have a problem will know it. I only go to see the doc if I need a refill on my meds and THEN I take a blood test to make sure everything is okay. Then I won't have to go til another 6 months which is better than having to go every month for no reason.

Don't let these people take advantage of you. Most people can just ask their parents for advice. But we can't. And we can't keep being ripped off by idiots.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Donate to Red Cross

I just donated to

This is just a reminder that there are have been floods in Pakistan and people need help. Build up some good karma and help fellow orphans. Go donate. You wouldn't want your parents swept away by flood waters. And if it did happen, i'm sure you would want someone to help you. It doesn't matter where you are from. We are all human and we should help each other.

You can donate to a specific cause or to whatever need is the greatest. Minimun donation of $10.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

An Orphans thoughts on God...and religion

We each live different lives. Some lives tend to have a higher demand for God while other lives tend to find God useless. When things go fine in ones life they never tend to think about God. But then when things go wrong we either get mad at God or ask Him for help.

I'm sure we all also wonder why God lets shit happen in this world.

Here are my thoughts on God and religion:

I think I knew that mom was gonna die. At a very young age I asked mom how the grow ups survive? How do they pay all those bills? She said that I shouldn't worry..that it won't happen for a long time. Well, she was wrong. I had dreams about mom dying before she was even diagnosed. I think that proves that there are more spiritual things going on that we even realize. And that there is God and spirits and more than just science in this world.

No matter what happens I refuse to be mad at God. I will wait until I die and then ask "what was all that?" Hopefully He will have a completely logical explanation. If He doesn't...then I will be upset. But I don't think it is possible for God to create a human that thinks more logically than He. So if I think that there must be some reason behind all this...then God must think so too. How could God be more stupid than I am. A creator cannot create something greater than the creator.

I never really thought about God before mom died. After mom died I moved in with Christian relatives. I think with Christianity there are two parts...there is the acting, dressing, taking etc like a Christian. (the Christian lifestyle if you will) and then there is the "you and God" part. No matter how hard I tried to say the right words or dress a certain way...the Christians still didn't accept me. they still said I was evil and has evil spirits etc. Finally after years or trying I realized a lot of Christians are crazy. They do not think for themselves. They are stuck in their own world. How could they call me a whore when I was a virgin? How could I be going to hell for liking boys? Its all just a game of keeping up appearances. They need to read between the lines when they read the Bible. But what is most important is the other part....the "you and God" part. Who cares about what people think? They haven't been what you have been through. God knows though. God knows if I an a whore or not. If God thinks I am a whore fine. God knows your heart. Those fake Christians don't. Just because your parents are dead doesn't mean you are going to hell.

I still talk and pray to God. He is all I have. He isn't anything like those judging hateful Christians. The Christians can't help you. God can.

I wasted so much time trying to please the Christians. I should have just been myself and known that God accepts me no matter what. God have us all our own choices. If we were meant to be prefect he wouldn't have given us freedom of choice and He wouldn't have had Jesus die for our mistakes.

Trust no one except God. He has hlped me when I had no electricity. I emailed my aunt to pray for me and she never replied. But I prayed to God and everything was taken care of.

Its like how we can't see our parents anymore...but we know they exist in some other form otherwise how would we be here. They were once alive and brought us into this world. We can't see God but He must exist somewhere in some form. We have faith that our parents are somewhere and we have faith that God is somewhere.

And things take time. When you order fries at a restaurant they take time to cook. When you pray it takes time for things to get into order. Everything takes time. Everything. Nothing is instantaneous. So try not to get mad at God. If people were more caring, then our tragedies wouldn't be as difficult. THings are difficult in life because people don't care about others in pain. If everyone tried to help everyone then pain and problems would be irrelevant. And then there is no point is being mad at God.

Maybe thats why bad things happen...because if people would be more caring then it would be okay. But that fact that people don't care makes life so much more difficult when bad things happen. Maybe God lets bad things happen in hopes of people reaching out and helping those in need. Like maybe God let my mom go so I can write thing blog and help others. And then you can help others. God didn't want to create humanity and have it become evil and useless. We are so much more capable.

So screw religion..its just a game of keeping up appearances.
Don't get mad at God until that last minute.
Help others.
Think for yourself.
God knows one else really knows you except you and Him.

Hope this helped you guys.

Going back

My life has two parts. There is the part before my mom died. I was happy then. Free. I listened to any music I wanted. Love horror films and I really looked up to my goth sister.

Then there is the part after my mom died. When I was put into a christian home and controlled and judged. I tried to fit in but no matter how hard I tried I was always the black sheep.

It feels like just 5 minutes ago mom died. and I am still trying to adjust to this shitty oklahoma bible belt life.

But lately I have been listening to the music I used to listen to before mom died. Music is like a time machine. It takes you back. Now it feels like I am back in the fits part of my life. Like mom and I turned around and went back home.

This is a great discovery. It feels like I have my old life back. A happy life.

Now I want to study my old self and go back to being like her. The movies my sister and I used to watch, the music we used to listen to. Sadly my sister no longer talks to me. She is a Christian now. I think she was a better person before she became a fake Christian.

I tried to adjust and make a new life after mom died...but I realize I need to go back to the way things were before.

Friday, July 30, 2010

Orphan tips on Trust

A suggested topic was "learning to trust". Of course we would like to think it would be healthy to learn to trust....but from my past experience you cannot trust anyone. Sometimes you can't even trust yourself.

Other people have familes to go to for help if there is a problem. But we do not. There have been times when I thought a friend would be there for me or help me etc. but then they would just do what they wanted and not help me. lame.

Its like with my move to NYC. I am having a few friends come with me. They want a one-bedroom but there is no garuntee they will get jobs fast enough that pay enough. Trusting is being dependant on someone for help. You cannot do that. So instead of running the rish of running out of money. I will get a studio and they can live with me if they want for a year and then we save money and get jobs for a better place. Now I am in control of the situation. I am not dependant on them.

When you trust someone and you are an orphan you run the risk of losing everything.

Learn to look out for yourself and don't let anyone take advantage of you.

I can't have a boss who threatens to fire me without notice. As an orphan I need job security. And there are more jobs in NYC than where I am now.

Dave Navarro, former guitarist of Jane's Addiction, lost his mom when he was 15. She was murdered. He has a tattoo that says "Trust No One". I completely understand.

Only trust yourself. That way you are in control. Be independant, not dependant on others.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Minimalist Wardrobe for Men

I wanted to show you guys this post. You can also check out the post before it. Its from the Everyday Minimalist Blog and the post is about what guys should wear. I think this is a good post for you guys who want to look more attractive and be the best they can be. Its just clothes. Why not dress nice?
Click here for the article. Some hot guys right here. This is what I hope to meet in NYC.


Summer Survival Tips for Orphans

No holidays for a while. So we can relax. But be careful Crap can happen in the summer time.

1. Stay cool. Drink lots of water. A headache can be a sign of dehydration.

2. Stay in. If you go out wear sunblock. But I recomend staying in. Drivers tend to drive fast in the summer and more car wrecks happen the hotter it is out.

3. Relax indoors. I know it may get lonely during the summer. But stay inside, read a book, clean, watch some movies. Or hang with a friend.

4. Use a fan instead of the air conditioner. The fan uses less electricity. I just paid my power bill and it was $18. Sweet! I only use the AC when it gets too hot. I turn it on for a few minutes to cool the place down then I go back to using only the fan. I got it for about $10 at wal-mart and I have it run at night. Nice and quite. And it doesn't blow dust like some AC systems do.

5. Keep a flash light handy incase you lose power. Storms happen a lot in the summer time.

6. Keep a tray of ice cubes in the freezer. This will also help if you lose power. You can use them to stay cool or melt it to drink it you lose water.

7. Walk around in your underwear. Yay! Just my way of staying cool.

8. If your car is over heating take it to a mechanic right away. Roll down the windows and turn the heat on. This will pull the heat away from the engine causing it to cool down a bit. You may need more coolant. Do not try to open the hood of your car if it is over heating. It will be hot and burn you. If smoke is coming out of the hood of your car pull over and call 911.

9. Driving with the air conditioning on makes the engine work harder and uses up gas faster. Drive the speed limit to save gas. People with parents will be speeding like idiots. Don't be like them. Save gas and drive safely. This will save you money and make your life easier.

10. Take showers regularly. Summer makes you sweat more and you will be more prone to zits.

So have fun, stay safe and be yourself. ORPHAN POWAH!!!

Friday, July 23, 2010

We Don't Fit In - Update

I hate hearing other people talk about their families. All the yever talk about it relatives and family gatherings. I am so sick of it. They live in their own little paradise. I always have to think about trying to survive. The hope of ever having a family is gone.

I got rid of my tv and my DVD player. I am still minimizing my belongings so I can move to NY and not have to be ripped off by mechanics or have to deal with a car. I don't know much about cars. I have no dad to ask. No boyfriend to help. Plus, there are more jobs in NY. If I get fired without notice I have no family to move in with.
And NYC isn't really a place where families gather. Everyone is on their own and working. I don't have to see some van pull into a neighborhood with large houses. People with parents are so spoiled. Typical Americans.

All orphans need to do what they can to make life eaiser. Thats what this entire blog is about. Coping, grieving and learning.

A year ago my car overheated. The mechanic told me the coolant was leaking. I had no damn clue what that meant...and no dad or relative to ask. I figured the air conditioner would just stop working. No. The coolant keeps the engine cool and if the engine over heats the car shakes and the radiator cracks and the car is unrepairable. Well stupid jerk mechanic didn't get his money. If he had told me how important it was to fix the coolant leak he could have gotten to fix it. But now I got a new car and am making payments on that.

When the mechanic told me how much it would cost to fix whatever the hek on my car it was about $2,000 and I cried. I told him I would call him back and I cried. No help. No family. I went to my boss and cried. He said he would take me to get a new car the next day. We didn't go until a few days later. It was difficult cus I had no credit and I needed a co-signer which if I had parents they would be the co-signer. A co-signer is someone who agrees to help you make payments if you have trouble.

I was never told to rotate the tires. Rotating tires helps your tires last longer. I was never taught to do that so I would have to get a new tire at least once a month. But the guys that I bought the car from told me I need to get the tires rotated. The tires lasted longer but they make a wierd noise...most likely cus they haven't been rotated in a long time but I still think they screwed up something. So sick of men making my life difficult.

So I am moving to NYC. And I won't have to deal with cars. I can ride the damn bus or subway. And more jobs means I don't have to live in fear of being fired without notice. I don't have to sit at the computer looking up suicide hotline numbers just because my boss just yelled at me and I am afraid I might lose my job.

And less families around. In NYC everyone is concerned about money and surviving. I also bet people are a lot smarter in NYC. I swear when the weather gets colder I am spending lunch in my car.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

I Hate Being An Orphan

There are so many problems that come with being and orphan. Everyday we are surrounded by people that we cannot relate to and cannot relate to us.

Some things that made being an orphan overall easier:

1. Friends. You need friends. Make friends as soon as you can. And stay in touch. Make sure they are good friends that care about you and can be trusted. You will need friends to hang out with on holidays and to help you move etc. Friends are your lifeline.

2. Save money. Save money at all costs. You don't have an family to throw money at you. You must earn it and save it. Anything can happen. You never know when you will need some extra money to survive. Money will help you stay stable and in control. It will help feed you, clothe you and help you if you need to move etc.

3. Be minimal. I have found that living a minimalist lifestyle will help reduce stress and save money and it will also be easier if you need to move. Don't own anything you can't carry yourself. Don't own too many clothes. Own just the basics and a few treats to keep you happy.

4. Stay motivated. Keep going in life. Have goals you want to achieve. Never give up. Do things in your life. Travel, work, learn things. Be free! When you get bored with your life then you become sad and things become dangerous. Accomplish things in your life and make your parents proud.

5. Look out for yourself. Use your brain. Don't trust just anyone. Plan ahead in life. Make wise decisions. Don't depend completely on other people. They will take advantage of you. You can't control people but you can control yourself and your decisions. If you don't like the way things something. Nothing is holding you back. Travel, get a new job if you have money saved up. Change your world before you change the world.

This has been a kinda lonely weekend for me. Wishing I had friends to hang out with. Been here since mom died. My guardian never allowed to have friends when I was a teen. I got rid of my radio and my tv this weekend. Just got my laptop. Nice and simple and free. Feels like college. I also got a $18 electricity bill because I unplug everything when I don't use it.

Stay strong and never give up!

Friday, July 16, 2010

Tips for female orphans

Don't own anything you can't carry yourself.

1. Don't own a large TV. Get a small tv.

2. Microwaves can be heavy. Take it to a recycling center and just use the stove.

3. Use a laptop instead of a big computer. You can also watch movies and video clips on your laptop. So the laptop doubles as a TV.

4. Matresses can be heavy. Once I get to NYC I will only use a futon matress. No more big matress to deal with. Plus they are hard to get rid of.

5. By owning things that you CAN carry, moving will be easier since you can carry everything and aren't dependant on others for help.

Minimalism really makes an orphans life easier. Especially if you are on your own.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Fear of Sabotaging Relationships

Suggested post. Lately I have been trying to get relationships to work out by not telling too much about my orphanhood. Of course I fear rejection and ruining things. We have learned that relationships are vital.

Everyone should try their best to keep the relationship alive but if it isn't worth it then don't bother.

I have always wanted to believe that I could be loved for who I am and not have to try to be loved by looking a certain way or talk a certain way etc. I don't think its true anymore. Everyone is so fake and picky.

But if I become fake to have someone love me then I won't be happy.

If someone isn't gonna love you for who you are then forget them. You should be able to be yourself if you want. But keep in mind that some people may not want someone who has a mullet or plays video games all the time. In every relationship there is some compromise.

I guy shouldn't break up with me cus my mom is dead or I have googly eyes on my phone or cus I like cartoons. But if I am bitchy or lazy I understand him not wanting me.

I think one of the most important things about relationships is to calm down. Don't freak out even if there is a break up.

Its normal to care about a relationship and keeping someone but it becomes a problem when we freak out when we think it may end. Then we show signs of being clingy and desperate and then the relationship does end.

With each breakup you learn. I have learned to not bitch, be positive, don't always talk about dead people, don't move in with him too soon, make sure he doesn't have anger problems, don't believe him when he says I love you, don't tell him everything about you, make sure he isn't married etc.

Its not good to be completely dependant on having a relationship with someone. You must be independant. Take care of yourself or someone may take advantage of you.

I don't have all the answers in this area. I am still working on this area of my life. I can only give small bits of advice.

Clam down, don't freak out and try to think things through. Be independant and look out for yourself. Think logically when there is a problem in a relationship. Don't make 5 million phone calls. Don't cry, don't drink, do turn to drugs, don't think suicide. Be yourself. Then you will be confident and happy and then people will want to stay with you. Do you really want to spend your whole life trying to be "perfect"? Life is too damn short and we orphans have already been through too much crap and drama.

Don't be clingy. Be able to spend sometime apart. Show that you are emotionally stable. Spending time apart makes the two of you want to be together more. Its called missing someone. Crying makes you look emotionally unstable. Just chill.

Feel free to comment and I will start on a part 2 if need be. Fear of commitment is coming soon.

Fear of Commitment in Relationships

This was a suggested post. I have had many relationships and none have really worked out. I wonder why a lot of the time. Was it me?

I think people are just too spoiled and picky. And as a result I have become picky. When I was a yound teen I wanted to be in a commited relatioship and to get married. I wanted to be taken care of because I knew that things would be much easier if I has someone to look out for me. But since I have been hurt so much and alone for so long I have been forced to look out for myself and be very independant.

Now to commit to someone means being controled by them or taken advantage of. When I am single I can earn my own money and spend my own money. I can dress any way I want and go anywhere I want etc.

I don't like it when I meet a guy and he asks if I plan to have kids or get married. How terrible to be tied down like that.

Most guys don't stick around for very long. Now neither do I. I am just looking out for myself. I just get tired of being hurt. Tired of trying.

Be yourself. Have fun. Look out for yourself. If you want to be a loner then be a loner. Don't let anyone control you. This is your life. Everyone fears being hurt.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Orphan Weddings

orphan weddings & orphan attendance at other people's weddings

This is a suggested topic. First of all I recently HAD to attend a wedding. I usually don't cus I get jealous easily and its family type event. But it was my bosses daughters wedding.

Most people cry at weddings. But I cried for a different reason. Knowing I will never have a father to walk me down the isle. No family on my side of the church. And also my aunt has really ruined my social life and I may never get married. I try to avoid weddings. I say I only attend funerals. Which is funny cus I have never been to a funeral either.

the good thing about attending a friends wedding is...if you ever get married you can ask them to be a part of it.

I really didn't want to attend that wedding. But my bosses boss said it would be inappropriate. Well she doesn't know that I am an orphan. Its funny cus every time she is mean to me a relative of hers gets sick or dies.

I know as a female orphan I may never have a normal wedding if at all. An orphan male needs no family members to have a wedding. He uses his brides as far as I know.

But for a female orphan there is no father to walk us down the isle and no mother to help plan. It sucks. Personally I will elope. I will just get legally married and run away with him. Screw weddings. Its a waste of money. Too much stress too. Plus there is just a lot about weddings I don't know about since I have no family.

If you are an orphan female and still want to have a wedding. I suggest you try to get friends to help.

I know its just lame. You wake up every damn morning and remember that you are an orphan and that things are different for you. Just remember that just cus someone has a wedding doesn't mean that they are loved, it doesn't mean that it will last, and it doesn't mean that they are better than you. Most of the time it doesn't mean anything. Its really sucks when an orphan goes through a divorce too. No family to move back to. Look out for yourself and don't be dependent on others.

A wedding is just a wedding. They come and go. But being loved doesn't cost anything and it lasts. Or at least its supposed to.

Never give up

Do you ever feel like no matter how hard you try you just can accomplish what you want.

I thought "Its like chasing the wind. How does one run with the wind? "

Then I realized. One runs with the wind by flying. They use what they can't catch to push them forward.

I am always thinking of ideas to fix my problems. And I rarely ever give up. Life can't be this hard. There has to be a way.

Do birds ever wonder what its like the always be walking on the ground?

Orphans wonder what its like to have a normal life.

People always wonder what its like to fly.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Boy advice for Girls: If you messed up be a Unicorn

I am writing this as I learn. I am still not a pro. I promise to write on other subjects as well. But this post goes along with the one before it. The BE CONFIDENT one. But what if you messed up. How to get him back? It it over? have you lost your chance completely.

1. If you are considered maybe safe. But he may think you are weird now.

2. Friends can get second chances.

3. Stay friends.

4. Friends aren't needy and don't stalk or beg to be dated.

5. Try not texting him or calling him. You want him to forget that last bad impression. But maybe he will think about you and text you. You may have screwed up on the acting confident in public part....but we can be a pro at being confident elsewhere. I have found that he will eventually text me. Actually after the party I was leaving and he said to text him. Funny cus I was thinking of never texting him again.

6. Not contacting him making him think you are talking to other people. He may check your twitter to see what you are up to so don't tweet about how you messed up with him. Tweet about how you are having such a nice day. Make him think you are having fun elsewhere. Kinda like at that concert but instead I just sat there which is the same as texting him constantly at home. DON'T keep calling him begging him to get back with you or hang out. I have found out that the guys I harass and try to get back with never come back. But if I let them go (usually cus I am not interested) they ALWAYS come back. Sometimes its a month later....sometimes a year or more later. They find you on and ask how you are doing etc.

7. Plan your second chance. Yes I dressed really cute. But I need to remember to stand up straight. Maybe bring some friends along to talk to. Bring friends you laugh a lot with.

8. People can never hear me at concerts. My voice is so high. So I thought maybe I could go around saying random shit cus no one will ever understand me anyways and laugh and move on to another person.

9. Take your mind off the mess up. Learn from your mistakes.

10. One big mistake I made was I left the rave early. But when I got home he called saying he was on his way to the concert. I told him I had just gone home. By driving back to the concert makes me seem desperate. I should have lied or never left the concert.

Be a unicorn. A fun beautiful creature that is hard to get, confident and has a life.

Boy Advice for Girls: BE CONFIDENT

Welp. Remember it is extremely important to seem confident and fun and happy. Last night I went to a rave. I looked extra cute but I was tired and timid. I forgot to smile and mingle. I ruined my second impression.

It would have been best for me to g around talking to people and smile so he could see how I interact with people etc. Or atleast just dance. But no. I sat at a table by myself listening to the music. Several people asked me if I was having a good time. I said yes. I don't think they believed me.

If you do what I seem shallow, sad and boring. I am so bad about this.

But then again. I really didn't know anyone. And I am not used to meeting people.

1. move around
2. smile
3. talk
4. laugh
5. be alive

You may not ever get another chance. We know this.

You want them to look at you from across the room and see you smiling and laughing. They want to see this too.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Orphan Summer Survival

My 4th of July was okay. I stayed in. I was bored most of the day. I regretted not getting more ice cream and comic books. But I spent time on and chatted with some friends on there. I got to see some fireworks from my porch/balcony. I didn't get too lonely. It was nice.

I have been very busy. I hope to post some more stuff soon. I just made a car payment and I am still not quite at half way on my car payment.

I have some nice ideas for future posts. Plus some summer tips. We don't have anymore holidays for a while which should be nice. But remember to stay out of the heat. People tend to get into car accidents a lot more in July. Its really hot and a lot of people are out. Try using a fan instead of the air conditioner. It will save you money. :)

Friday, July 2, 2010

Tips for Orphans on the 4th of July

July 4th is Indepenance Day in the USA. Lots of people get drunk. So I stay at home to stay safe. If you don't have any friends to hang out with on the 4th here are some things you can do to stay safe and chill:

1. Stock up on snacks. Get some hot dogs and ice cream.

2. Stay at home. Lots of drunk drivers out there. So stay home and away from idiots.

3. Get some movies to watch.

4. Watch fireworks from them on tv or on or maybe from your window if you are lucky.

5. Just relax. Most people get to go home early on the 4th. Just chill and be glad the USA is pretty cool.

6. Treat yourself. Last year I stopped by the store on the way home and got some teas. YAY! Wear your pajamas and just relax.

This weekend I got some hotdogs and tea. I hope to relax. I did hear some fireworks going off a few days ago at a local church. It did freak me out. It freaked me out cus I want to go out there and enjoy the fireworks with friends and family...but I have none. So I just go on Twitter and Youtube. See what other people are doing in other cities etc. I know it can really hurt remembering the old times when mom and I would go to see the fireworks. I remember so many. We went to a different place each time. And she would buy me glow sticks etc. But just try to chill. And next year try to plan ahead and hang with some friends. And buy some fireworks.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Dating advice for Orphans: Be the best

This post is for both men and women. It should be obvious. But no one wants a person who looks like crap or is crap. Who wakes up in the morning and thinks "oh I want to dress like a slob for the rest of my life?" No. Be the best you can be.

For Women:
Men want an ideal girl. Perhaps with a title. Men want to be able to brag about their girl and say "my girlfriend is a model" or singer or asian or a virgin. Its all ideals. I know we would think they would want someone who doesn't cheat and is actually doing something with their lives. But no. Men tend to be immature little boys. They want th prettiest girl even if one day she will be old and ugly. Go fig. So...dress your best, get a nice haircut, drink some green tea, work out, go blonde or redhead. But also be yourself.

Sometimes I look at some married women and it is SO obvious why their hubby chose them...cus their tits are big, or they are asian or a redhead etc. lame but its true. No one wants an orphan. So don't tell him. Get some other a cheerleader, prom queen, etc. Maybe be a belly dancer. Guys want a girl to be proud of.

I don't really know what I am. I just want to be me.

For men:
Just about the same thing goes for men. Women want a decent guy. A guy who dresses nice and is hardworking. A guy who is doing something with his life. I never understood why a guy would just fall apart after a divorce. Why not make yourself better? Clean the house, get a haircut, new clothes, and become someone better.
Not very many girls want a guy with no job, no money, no home and no car. Those 4 things are very important. A great place to meet chicks is at the gym. Which is great cus not only are you working on getting in shape but you are also meeting people. (side note: get a month-to-month contract) Most gyms sign you up for a three year contract and you get stuck with it. A month-to-month contract is much easier to get out of. Or just try jogging or playing sports. Women are not impressed by alcohol or drug use. So don't. It will ruin your life.

Women love guys in neck ties, they like smart guys, talented guys and nice guys.
Do something with your life. Work for a company, write songs, follow your passion, get hobbies. Try cooking ,writting a book, building websites. These skills are not only impressive but can also get you a job. And job makes money which pays for car and a home and extra money to spend on chicks.

Monday, June 28, 2010

Dating Tips for Orphan Women

I will evetually post on dating tips for orphaned men. But I think orphan women really need help in this area. Having a man in a womans life can make things SO much easier. So I wanted to give a few tips for orphans and dating etc.

1. No Drama. Men hate drama. I used to think it was okay to tell a guy all about my dead mom and how I am an orphan etc. No. Men don't like akward uncomfortable situtations like that. So no drama. No bitching. No being negative. No complaining that he isn't spending time with you. Sometimes men actually are busy. Don't harrass him. Don't text him all the time. Sometimes stop texting or calling him and wait til he calls you. This way you know he is thinking about you and it helps him think you are drama-free. Its also playing hard-to-get. These things will be very important if he breaks up with you. I will post on break up tips later. You won't want to miss it!

2. Be positive. Men like girls who are happy and fun. Always have something positive to say. It you text him. Say something positive and not negative. Don't say "oh I hate my job" but instead say "I can't wait til lunch". If you have a Twitter, Myspace or facebook make sure to have your status and tweets be fun and happy things. "I went shopping today" or "I love my kitty". Get the idea. Being fun can make a guy want to be with you. Men like girls who smile and laugh and are fun. I know it sounds cheesy but its true. Make sure to smile in your photos on your facebook etc. Even if you want a sexy photo..make sure you have a slight smile on your face. No sad stuff. This also goes along with being confident.

3. Don't tell him about your orphan hood. Atleast not until you really have to. I always wondered what would happen if I didn't tell a guy the truth about my dead mom etc. And guess what...he stuck around. Most guys run from drama and sad stuff. They don't know how to handle it. I recently met up with a guy at the mall. And I mentioned to him that my mom has passed away. I mention it twice and both times he changed the subject right away. He may be afraid I might cry or that he might cry. It was kinda a bad move on my part. I'll keep you posted on this subject. But until then my advice is don't tell him any of the personal orphan stuff. By not telling him about it...he can make up stuff in his mind that you are perfect. And by the time you do have to tell him...hopefully he won't care.

4. Don't be too easy. Be confident and show restraint. Don't call all the time. Wait and see if he calls you sometimes. Spend time apart. Make him think you have a life. And make him want to be a part of it. Not being easy also goes along with not being too clingy.

5. If he breaks up with you don't freak out. Refer to tip #1. Again I will post more on this later.

6. Be confident. Even if you don't feel like it. Do it! Stand up straight, smile, and be happy. I'm still working on this.

7. Don't be clingy. Orphan females tend to be very clingy. If a guy breaks up with her or doesn't spend enough time with her...she freaks out. We panic and feel alone and not in control. You need to calm down and don't be clingy. Or you will lose him. Give him some space and show him that you can be independant even if you feel like you want to call him like crazy.

8. If you are going to meet him in person for the first time, dress really nice. Don't think that he will accept you for who you are and wear whatever. If you don't give a good first impression then there will be no second chance. I have had this happen a lot. But I am learning. Dress cute, make sure you don't wear anything that makes you look fat. Like when I met this guy at the mall. I wore a hoodie over a cute tight shirt...well that hoodie made me look fat. I should have wore a cute tank top.

9. Never talk about ex-boyfriends. Even if you are making a point. Don't do it. Just don't. You don't want to hear about his ex-girlfriends, do you? NOPE! So don't talk about your ex-boyfriends.

10. Don't let him know that you don't have a dad. He will treat you like crap. He will break up with you in the worst way cus he knows your dad isn't gonna protect you. He will take what he wants from you and then leave you. Just say you dad travels a lot or something. Or talk about your bog brother and how he looks out for you. This is a tricky one but very important.

I hope some of this helps I will post more on it soon. I am just learning things myself too.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Father's Day Orphan Update

Hey guys! How is it going!? Today hasn't been too bad. II been watching videos on and eating snacks. Taking it easy. I also got a few friends I can text or call if I want.

I just wanted to remind you to take it easy today. I want a Happy Meal but I refuse to leave my house.

I may make some bracelets etc.

So yeah just take it easy. Its half way through. Listen to some music, take a nap, watch a movie and improve you positive bitching. Make a list of good things going on in your life.

1. Its nice outside. (I like rain more)

2. I got snacks

3. I got music

4. I got friends to text or call

5. Its hot out but I can run around in my underwear!

Remember there are hundreds of other people in the world that don't have dads. Why should we all pout?

Friday, June 11, 2010

Orphan Tips for Father's Day

Its getting closer. I am starting to see advertisements for Father's Day gifts and stuff. don't let it get to you. The new Toy Story Movie comes out that weekend. Thinking about Father's Day just makes it worse. Here's some tips for you guys to make Father's Day easier for you

1. Keep yourself busy. Busy but not stressed. Don't sit and think about how sad you are. Watch a movie, read a book, hang with friends, clean the house. Stay busy. Treat it like any other day.

2. Stay in. I prefer to stay in on Mother's Day and Father's Day. I don't want to see other people with their parents and I also may be kinda grumpy and I don't want anyone giving me an attitude when I know they have parents. So I stay in. But some people may get lonely so you may want to go out and see a movie or something. But plan this a head of time.

3. Treat yourself. Lately I have been indulging in the Kandi Kid life. Its people who wear shirts with cartoons on them and believe in PLURR (Peace, love, unity, respect and responisbility) I love it. It all makes me feel like a kid again. There is much more to the Kandi kid culture and you can do the research on your own. But my point is to be like a kid again. No one really glows up. Lots of men still play video games. Lots of adult still live with their parents. As orphans we are forced to grow up fast and work hard. Be a kid once in a while. Make Father's Day an easy day. Rent a movie, order pizza, play your favorite cd, take a bath, try a new video game, sleep in. Its just one day.

4. Stock up on the essentials. I plan on staying in so I make sure to have money so I can order a pizza, extra food, medicine in case I get sick, etc. I got sick last Mother's Day and I wished I had some orange juice to help me. Stock up on healthy foods. Green tea helps your immune system. And if you do start to cry, remember to drink water. Replace those tears. Or you will get dehydrated and get sick.

5. If you cry, drink water. I gotta say it again. If you cry, drink water. Or you will get sick. If you cry, eat healthy, Drink some green tea, some veggies, orange juice. Not too much orange juice. Some milk.

6. Try getting some multi-vitamins. Its kinda like when you have a headache you take some asprin. Well if you are sad or feel sick take a vitamin. Or better yet take a vitamin each day so stay healthy.

7. Have a friend you can call. Have some friends you can chat with on or or or whatever. Talking and chatting with friends will cheer you up.

8. Plan. Make plans. Don't just assume that it will be a breeze and that you will just stay in. Make plans and make backup plans. I plan on sleeping in, checking my email, watching some cartoons, eatting breakfast, listening to some music, playing with the dog, maybe text a friend, and then do it all over again. I may also finish some art.

You get the idea right? Don't assume it will be easy. Just make it a fun day. Why should it be a bad day for you? Stay positive.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Father's Day Preparation for an Orphan

Well I have started to see ads for Father's Day. Its a few weeks away. I will not be putting up the chat this time. But again I am telling you that we need to prepare.

Things to do to prepare for Father's Day:
-plan to hang out with a friend
-try to hang out with a friend
-find a friend to hang out with on FD
-stock up on food for that weekend
-rent a movie to watch on FD
-treat yourself on that day
-sleep in on FD
-stock up on Green Tea. It will keep you from getting sick.

I know I don't want to have to leave my house on Father's Day. I want to stay in. So I will have to stock up on food.

-maybe get a book to read for the day
-listen to a new cd on that day
this may mot be a good idea since that cd will remind you of that day)

I will post more. I plan on trying to find a friend to hang out with...if that doesn't work out I will try to relax and spoil myself. Last Mother's Day was terrible.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

What an orphan should do on Memorial Day

Hey, Just thought I would give a quick update. I guess this post would only be for US orphans. But I want to treat this weekend kinda like Mother's Day weekend. I got some hot dogs to fry up and some candy to spoil myself on. Its a three day weekend and I am relax and I feel like a kid. I got some beads so I can make some necklaces if I get bored. I still had sad dreams of mom last night though. But this weekend shouldn't be too sad for an orphan. Most families just have a cook out and play music, swim in a pool and watch tv. We can do that at home. And pools are gross. People pee in them. A bath is much better.

So heres what to do on Memorial Day if you are lonely:
-fry some hot dogs. You should have gotten some a head of time.
-play some music.
-take a bath.
-watch some tv or youtube
-make some necklaces
-sit out on the porch
-hang with friends
-try drinking green tea or fruit tea all weekend. Its fun to try something new and it will help pass the time.
-Walk around the house in your underwear.
-Just be a kid and relax
-be glad you don't have to hang out with a family that complains about the way you look or your lifestyle etc.
-stay positive!

Remember Memorial Day is to celebrate the soldiers who have and are fighting for our country. They can't even come home to be with their families. We are like soldiers trying to fight off our everyday grief.

Try watching the sunrise too!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Orphan Advice: Never Grow Up!

When our parents died we were forced to become adults even if we were just little kids. But if you look around at all the other adults who still have parents, you will notice they are kinda spoiled. They never had to grow up. They are still little kids. Why should we grow up?

We are forced into survival mentality. We see the harsh reality of life. We need to take a chill pill and be a kid again.

I have been looking back on how I have been trying to adjust since my mom died when I was 15. I was a happy kid before she died. Then after she died I tried to be happy, tried to fit in with the new family. But they always had unrealistic rules. Treated me differently than their own kids. College was good since everything was taken care of and I had no rules...just like a kid.

So I am going to try to be more free like a kid for the next year before my move to NY. The whole heiress thingy is kinda like that. Being your own boss. Spoiling yourself. Being confident of yourself. Orphans are in survival mode. Sad and stressed out. But an heir or heiress stays spoiled and happy.

Here are some things that I plan to do and/or suggest you do:

1. East fast food once a month. Atleast. McDonalds makes me feel like a kid again. And they brought back the Happy Meal box. YAY

2. Walk around the house in your underware. I used to do this as a kid. At least wear those fluffy slippers.

3. Sleep in on your days off and watch some cartoons. Why not?

4. Visit the mall. My mom always used to take me to the mall. They got fast food. So maybe you can get McDonalds at the mall and its double the spoiled-ness.

5. Try eatting some kids cereal. They don't have prizes in them anymore but the Happy meals do.

6. Watch a movie. We always watched movies as kids. Why stop?

7. Dress like a kid. My room was always pink. So I will wear pink. I always wanted a Barbie when I was little so I got a Barbie shirt.

8. You only live once. Enjoy yourself. But remember to not over spend or over eat.


There is not point in waking up in the middle of the night everynight regreting your teen years, or childhood etc. I wish my sister would have taken me to the fair...well I will round up some of my friends and go to the fair. I wasn't allow to go to prom. Why not round up some friends and dress up and have a night out on the town?

One final to get friends. Myspace? Facebook? Church? Old high school friends. Or just go solo. But be careful about going to the fair alone at night. Better go during the day time if you are alone. Be safe.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Health Tips for Orphans Part 2: Tonsil Stones

Mother's Day really took a toll on me and my tonsils swelled up and I got a few small tonsil stones. They are gross. They make your breath smell like rotten eggs and you can taste it in your mouth too. Its white blood cells fighting an infection.

1. Don't eat too much food that contains calcium. Too much calcium can cause kidney stones and tonsil stones. And tonsil stones are nasty.

2. If you do get tonsil stones. Cut back on the calcium intake. I have found that mine was too high. (On Mother's Day I ordered two medium pizzas..big mistake)

3. Drink orange juice. This builds up your immune system and also reduces those tonsil stones.

4. A soda every now and then is good. A soda can help break down tonsil stones.

5. Drink lots of water. Again it helps reduce tonsil stones.

6. Keep your mouth clean. Floss, brush with toothpaste and rinse with a good strong mouthwash. You spit out the mouthwash...don't swallow it.

7. Eat veggies and fruits. No one gets brocolli stuck in their tonsils.

I hope this helps. Stay healthy. And guess what? Its my Birthday.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Why people buy things they don't need

People buy things they don't need because they want their life to change. When someone is happy with the way things are they can go for a long time without buying stuff.

People will buy new clothes to feel like they have a new life. They change their hair color. New furniture etc. All to change their life.

I miss my mom so I buy a jacket like I used to have when I was little. I don't like the way people treat me so I change the color of my hair. Maybe they will be nicer to me now.

People also buy things to make time pass by. People want time to pass by cus they are not happy.

People throw out things to make life feel different also. Out with the old and in with the new.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

College Graduate Advice

One big mistake I made after I graduated was I never researched what I should be paid for my job even at entry level. I just took whatever seemed nice to me and now I am stuck doing something I should be getting paid a lot more to do.

A Graphic Artist should ge paid $30,000-$40,000. Entry level maybe $26,000. Hopefully after three years I will be able to get paid what I do.

Don't let people take advantage of you. Make sure you know what you deserve.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

What to do on Mother's Day if your mom is dead

well. I tried to make it nice for you guys. I have discovered that the more you think about it all...the worse it gets and the worse you feel. I don't think I prepared enough. If I could go back to Friday I would have stocked the fridge full of ice cream and McDonalds. But no. I feel sick and I have no food that I want to eat and I don't want to go out. So I ordered pizza.

So just try to be an heir or heiress and take it easy. Take you mind off of it all and spoil yourself. Watch TV and eat treats. Wear your comfy clothes. I have never had such a tough Mother's Day. Really. At least on mom's Bday its just me. And her death day its just me. But on Mother's Day its everywhere. Even Christmas its not just for moms, its more of all the family so its easier. So take it easy. And yes I have cried today...but its okay...the pizza will be here soon and I am still wearing yesterdays makeup.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Master the Art of Positive Bitching

I find myself bitching about things in the morning. We need to bitch about positive things. Think of positive pitching like bragging to yourself.

"I don't have to run any errands today!"

"I ate a healthy lunch today!"

"The weather is awesome today....just like me!"

Instead of "my boss is so stupid" try "I am so much smarter than my boss".

"I'm so glad I read about positive bitching on the Orphan Handbook blog today!"

Reminder: I'm gonna post the Mother's Day chat early so you can bookmark it. I will also post my twitter and make it so its public and not private just for the weekend. I also will post a link to my Youtube page so you can watch videos if you get bored. I will be tweeting all day on Mother's Day so you guy can keep up with what I am up to.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Don't give up!

No matter what you are going through....DON"T GIVE UP. Life isn't over yet. Things can change at anytime for better or for worse.

Everyday I find myself focusing on the bad in my life. I have to remind myself to list the good things and above all don't give up.

An orphan would give up...but an heir or heiress would not.

I want a better job. I want my car paid for. I want to move. And I won't give up until I get what I want. Even when I do get what I want...why give up then?

A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.- Zen saying.

Wait til the last minute to give up.

I used to be so hopeful but now its hard to dream. I just have to try harder. And you do too! That is how you accomplish your not giving up. Keep up with the positive thinking and think of ways to solve your problems. Everyday try to write a positive paragraph. Instead of writing about all your problems try listing your progress and the good things that are happening.

Here is my positive paragraph for the day:
I dreamt of hot guys last night and my headache went away. My boss isn't as mad at me as he was Friday. The weather is nice. I put gas in my car. I have no bills to pay today. I have a feeling I will sleep well tonight. I have made progress on my car payments. My mom died before she could ever teach me what a credit card was...and thats a good thing.

Friday, April 30, 2010

How to Move to New York

There are always jobs in New York...even in the middle of an economic recession. People get paid more in New York City too! So when your boss treats you like shit and shakes his millionaire asshole head at you like you are stupid when you are really putting forth all you've got...moving to NY seems oh so nice!

You won't need a car in New York. No more being ripped off by mechanics. No more rednecks with dog testicles hanging from the back of their pickup trucks. New York is full of people who actually are doing something with their lives. Working hard. And I bet they know how to spell. Everyone has a hope and a dream in NY. Let's go!

1. You have got to read about New York. Learn the areas, how to get a job in New York, how to get an apartment in New York City...etc. You can look all over online at various blogs. But having a book packed full with info is best. I got the red one below at home along with a map of Manhattan. Make sure the map also has a subway map too.

2. Plan an escape! Some books even give tips on the actual moving. The best ways to move. I would prefer Greyhound if I didn't have a dog. If you have small pets you may have to drive yourself or go by plane. Planes will not fly pets in the summer or winter. Pick a place to live. Research it too!

3. Visit New York first. You need to get to know the area. This will help you find an apartment faster etc. Again, a book about moving to New York and a map will help with the visit that will help you with the move!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Want a Successful Business?

(Oragami art by Won Park)

Try being simple and minimal. Look at its one of the most successful website in the history of the World Wide Web. is still relatively simple and easy to understand. and on the other hand has made several "improvements" but it has gotten more complicated. And once you make a website more complex by adding features, you can't take them away.

I deleted both of my Myspaces this morning to try and make a new one but it is extremely complicated. I may just say goodbye to Myspace for good.

I think the same rule goes for everything else. The best cars are simple cars. Not too many features. Just because its simple doesn't mean its cheaply made either. Best books are simple and to the point. best clothes are simple. No one wants something with several layers, belts, straps or buttons. Just put it on and go.

Too many features can scared off customers. Too many rules in a contest will scared off people. Too many words in a contract will scared off buyers.

Too many ingredients in a food or too many items on a sandwich.

Simple simple simple.

Too many options can be a bad thing. Kinda like too many bills.

People want simple. One easy hidden fees.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

How to make life more enjoyable

Real heirs and heiresses have a very enjoyable life. We can't take away some of the things that make life a greiving, job stress, bills, etc. But we can always add some things to make us enjoy life a little more.

Things you should try that will make your life more enjoyable:

1. Sweatpants. Yes! I had to buy some a few weeks ago for a treadmill stress test. I put them on and they were so soft. I remember in college I wore hoodies but I never tried the sweatpants. These are the ones with the drawstrings so they always fit. And you can wear them around the house or out when you run errands. Then I read Paris Hiltons book "Confessions of an Heiress" and she also writes about how comfortable sweatpants are. You gotta try them really.

2. Keeping a journal. Remember I said it helps to count your blessings. Every morning I find myself grumbling to work. But I need to think of the good things. Keeping a journal makes you write down those good things. I understand keeping track of the bad gotta get through em. But keep getting excited about the good things. List them...everyday. Like mine today would be: nice weather, there is nothing wrong with my tires, I don't have to pay any bills until payday, the recession is over, I am on lunch break now, I showed my readers my silly Youtube page, I have a nice purse, etc. I could go on and on. You should too!

3. Fruit flavored tea. Its healthy and its fruit flavored. Its not like the usually tea flavor. Remember to add honey or it won't taste right. Its like a little healthy treat. Boil the water, put the tea bag in the mug, pour the hot water in the mug, pull the tea bag in and out of the water...up and down for about a minute, throw tea bag away, squirt some honey in the mug, stir so the honey dissolves, then add some cold water and I put it in the fridge to chill. And I drink it later.

4. Keep track of the funny things that happen to you. Just little funny stories. Like I was looking for a picture of Paris Hilton to put on my and he walked into my office and the computer froze. Now he thinks I like girls. HA! Paris always gets me in trouble.

Friday, April 23, 2010

How to be happier

Not how to be happy. Just happier. Positive thinking. But what does that mean? Here is a method. Try counting your blessings. We always pay attention to the crap in life. Like going to work, paying bills, getting sick, and so many other problems. When Paris Hilton tweets about how she is loving life....she is focusing on the good. She isn't gonna tell you that bad things that happen in her life unless its funny like her phone breaking.

So try focusing on the good. Like today I have to go to the doctors again and I have a lot of work and I just want to go home. But I need to think about how I got a free meal from Arbys because of an advertising promotion we are doing, and my "club sandwiches not seals" hoodie came in the mail, and its raining (I love the rain).

Its like I said before...changing that orphan mentality to an heiress mentality.

An orphan would say..."I'm tired...I want to go home."

An heiress/heir would say "ITS FRIDAY! And I get to sleep in tomorrow"

Here is some good news. I am still gonna post that Mother's Day chat on here. And you guys can still follow me on twitter since I don't have internet at home. So there's some nice things to think about. I got some other neato stuff too.

And if you want to find out where you can get a "club sandwiches not seals" hoodie. Here is a link: club sandwiches not seals hoodie. Make sure to get the right size. Mine is a small.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Heiress Spotlight: Ivanka Trump

Ivanka Maria Trump (born October 30, 1981) is an American businesswoman, socialite, heiress, and fashion model. The daughter of Ivana and Donald Trump, she is Executive Vice President of Development & Acquisitions at The Trump Organization. Before joining the family business she worked for Forest City Enterprises, and joined forces with Dynamic Diamond Corp., a diamond trading company sightholder, to design and introduce a line of jewelry at the brand's first flagship retail store called 'Ivanka Trump' on Madison Avenue.

Trump's first cover was a 1997 issue of Seventeen. Since then, she has made her way down fashion runways for Versace, Marc Bouwer and Thierry Mugler. She has done advertisement campaigns for Tommy Hilfiger and Sassoon Jeans and was featured on the cover of Stuff in August 2006 and again in September 2007. She was also recently featured on the covers of Forbes, Golf Magazine, Avenue Magazine, Elle Mexico and in the October 2007 issue of Harper's Bazaar. She placed Number 83 in the 2007 Maxim Hot 100. She has also placed Number 99 in the Top 99 Women of 2007 and then at 84 in the 2008 edition on

Trump has recently written a book called The Trump Card. From a rising star in the business world, The Trump Card is a book for young women on how to achieve success in any field. It was published in October of 2009.

The Trump Card: Playing to Win in Work and Life

Sources: wikipedia

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

What to do on a dead loved ones birthday?

Real heirs and heiresses have dead parents. My mothers birthday is coming up. Its not that much of a big deal but I do notice it. Of course it doesn't make sense to go out and buy something for her. But it does make sense to do something that would make her proud. Of course I should always try to make her proud. Its kinda like a new years resolution but its on her birthday. If I were in school I could study extra hard for a test or something etc. But I am out of college. And I am already trying to move to New York to make her proud.

I think its a cool idea to try to make her proud for her birthday. Its like the sadness doesn't stop me from doing what I should do in life. Its like she is still here.

Somethings aren't that easy to accomplish in a day. Some things take longer. Like I thought trying to do some modeling for mom would be cool. But its kinda hard to find a photographer and get enough guts to do it. Plus it takes practice. I'll try to think of some things to do for her Bday.

Things you can do to make your loved one proud on their birthday:

- Eat healthy for a day
- stop smoking
- donate to
- try working out
- vow to do better in school
- pay off that stupid credit card
- recycle
- take acting classes
- take modeling classes
- try to get into a gallery
- make some art that she/he used to make
- cook something she/he used to cook
- learn to cook
- donate to a cause that helps fight against what took them away. ie: American Cancer Society
- keeping this blog going!

If you think of any more please comment. This can help all of us.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Simplify your Library

This is something I saw on Easter. My friend had one. You can download books on to it and read them. Its much more simpler than having stacks of books around the house. I think its kinda like an ipod but instead of playing can read books on it. Its perfect for the minimalists library. It can even read to you.

Slim: Just over 1/3 of an inch, as thin as most magazines

Lightweight: At 10.2 ounces, lighter than a typical paperback

Wireless: 3G wireless lets you download books right from your Kindle, anytime, anywhere; no monthly fees, service plans, or hunting for Wi-Fi hotspots

Books in Under 60 Seconds: Get books delivered in less than 60 seconds; no PC required

Paper-Like Display: Reads like real paper with no glare, even in bright sunlight

Long Battery Life: 25% longer battery life; read for days without recharging

Carry Your Library: Holds over 1,500 books

Read-to-Me: With the new text-to-speech feature, Kindle can read every newspaper, magazine, blog, and book out loud to you, unless the book's rights holder made the feature unavailable

Free Book Samples: Download and read first chapters for free before you decide to buy.

Large Selection: Over 350,000 books, newspapers, magazines, and blogs available

Kindle Wireless Reading Device (6" Display, U.S. Wireless)

Dorothy Miller was my Grandmother

Dorothy Miller, who died in July and whose art collection is being auctioned by Christie’s next week, was MoMA’s first curator and director Alfred Barr’s most trusted collaborator, a Greenwich Village scenester for several decades, and the woman who did the most for postwar American art.

In July, Dorothy Miller quietly passed away in her Greenwich Village apartment, seven months shy of her 100th birthday. She was remembered at a MoMA memorial service last week, and an auction of her art collection at Christie’s in November will remind the latest generation of collectors, connoisseurs, dealers, and scholars of her role in the postwar ascension of American art. Auction experts predict the paintings, sculpture, folk art, and furniture that decorated her rent-controlled one-bedroom apartment on 8th Street (which had no doorman, no alarm, and no insurance) will sell for well over $12 million. See full article here.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Books by Gloria Vanderbilt

I was going to do a post on books by famous heiresses but turns out Gloria has written quite a few. Now don't worry all you males. I will still post stuff relivant to you.

Gloria Laura Morgan Vanderbilt (born February 20, 1924) is an American artist, actress, heiress, and socialite most noted as an early developer of designer blue jeans. She is a member of the prominent Vanderbilt family of New York and mother of CNN's Anderson Cooper.

She became heiress to a half share in a five million dollar trust fund upon her father's death from cirrhosis when she was 15 months old. The rights to control this trust fund while Vanderbilt was a minor belonged to her mother, who traveled to and from Paris for years, taking her daughter with her. They were accompanied by a beloved nanny young Gloria named "Dodo", who would play a tumultuous part in the child's life, and her mother's identical twin sister Thelma, who was the mistress (lover) of The Prince of Wales during this time. As a result of frequent spending, her mother's use of finances was scrutinized by the child Vanderbilt's paternal aunt Gertrude Vanderbilt Whitney. Whitney, a sculptor and philanthropist, wanted custody of the young heiress and soon a famous custody trial became the lead story of 1933. The trial was so scandalous that at times, the judge would make everyone leave the room so as to listen to what young Vanderbilt had to say without anyone influencing her. Some people heard weeping and wailing inside the court room. Testimony was heard depicting the mother as an unfit parent; Vanderbilt's mother lost the battle and Vanderbilt became the ward of her Aunt Gertrude.

It Seemed Important at the Time: A Romance Memoir

Obsession: An Erotic Tale

There are a few others. If you click on the links the other books should be listed nearby.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

I Did Not Love My Adopted Child

An article on the 33-year-old Tennessee nurse Torry Hansen, who sent the 7-year-old son she'd adopted on a plane back to Russia.
I Did Not Love My Adopted Child

People need to realize that adopting and or becoming a guardian isn't going to be some easy fantasy. These kids are going through a lot. I can't speak for all orphaned kids but I know I had my little problems. And eventually my aunt gave up. She said some terrible hurtful things. Saying she wanted me out of the house.

Fine! Give up! Be a crappy parent. What good are you? Why did you even adopt in the first place if you weren't gonna try your best?

Monday, April 12, 2010

Idea for Mother's Day

I thought it might be a cool idea to have a chat on here on Mother's Day. We don't have to talk about our moms or anything like that. We can talk about anything. What do you guys think? Maybe for a few hours at least. I can post the chat box on here and you don't even have to register to chat.

Now if you think it would be a cool idea you gotta comment and let me know.

Friday, April 9, 2010

How to have an Heiress Mentality

Orphans at any age need to have an heir or heiress mentality. Not just a survival mentality. We used to visit this website thinking we don't have anything in this world and that we are all alone. We need to focus on the good and realize that we are smarter and more hard working that those who have parents.

Just show you know what an heir is:

heir (âr)
1. A person who inherits or is entitled by law or by the terms of a will to inherit the estate of another.
2. A person who succeeds or is in line to succeed to a hereditary rank, title, or office.
3. One who receives or is expected to receive a heritage, as of ideas, from a predecessor.

Having an heir mentality can also help the grieving process. Its focusing on the good. I also think it would make my mom proud.

Try focusing on the benfits of being an orphan and it makes you feel more like an heir.

1. We can save money since we don't have to buy Mother's or Father's Day cards.

2. We don't have to visit or deal with relatives on holidays. We can just stay at home and relax.

3. If we have a money problem we have brains and do something about it. We don't ask our parents for help like little spoiled brats.

4. Most people freak out over the dumbest littlest things. We don't freak out about much. Not anymore.

5. If orphaned by the age of 18 you could qualify for a full ride scholarship. That means you get to go to college for free. No student loans to pay off.

The list goes on. I just need to think of more.

Look at Pippi Longstockings for example. She isn't real exactly but I'm almost like her. An orphan but also an heiress. She had all those gold coins, a dead mom, a sailor dad who is never around and she lived in a big house. They totally glorified the orphan life. We need to focus on that.

Yes there are some things we were never taught...but this blog should cover most of it.

So instead of waking up every morning wondering "Why me? Why must I be an orphan" try thinking like an heir. Life is more simple since we are orphans. We are smarter and more harder working. Life should be easier for us. Lets make it that way.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

The Recession is Over

I have read several articles and have heard on the news that the economic recession is over. People are spending more. Its only a matter of time before there will be more jobs out there.

Just remember to be wise with your money so you can stay on top in case of another recession.

1. Pay off your credit cards and never get another credit card ever again.

2. Put some money into a savings account. I had $500 in the past quarter and when I got my quarterly compounded bank statement I got an extra $1.50. Yay.

3. Always keep some extra money saved up for emergencies.

4. Buy yourself treats only once in a while. Like one a month...or every other month.

5. Read up on my past posts about using money wisely.

Now that the recession is over there will be jobs soon, people will buy stuff again, prices may get higher but you may also get a pay raise at work. Its the end of scrapping by and being scared shitless. Its the beginning of becoming an heiress instead of an orphan. We have inherited the world.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

From Orphan to Heiress

I'm sick of constantly being reminded that I am an orphan. I think we need to think of the good things that come from being orphaned. We need to go from an orphan mentality to and heir mentality. We are blessed and not cursed. Yes, we love your lost loved ones and we miss them but from our loss we have benefits and have also learned to be more thankful for what we have. We have to work harder to survive. We have been enlightened. We are better than the others. Instead of saying "yeah my mom is dead". I can say "I got to go to college for free since my mother passed away. Free food, housing, cable, books, tuition, and schools supplies". yeah. We have a better life. I may not have inherited much but things are better.

I found this below. Some of its just silly crap to me. But some I think is relevant to us (see #1). Its not "my mom died of cancer and now I am alone" but its "my mom was a great artist and I got to go to college for free cus of her" or "my dad just got back from Hong Kong" not "I never met my dad but I think he lived in Hong Kong". No one believes us anyways when we say we are orphans. We sound kinda stupid when we say that anyways. Its pretty much like being a kid forever. Its the nice easy life we need to have. So change your mentality. Its so much happier.

Paris Hilton Book: Confession Of An Heiress

1. Instructions on How to be an Heiress (sneak preview)
Choose your chromosomes wisely. This may seem like ludicrous advice, but actually it isn't. If an heiress is in control of everything, why shouldn't she be in control of who she's born to? You know how everyone always says there are no accidents? Well, I believe you choose who you're born to. And if you do have the misfortune of being born into the wrong family, remember: No one has to know. Airing family laundry is definitely a big no-no for an heiress. You can always reinvent yourself and your lineage if you have to. Half of Park Avenue and Bel Air have. Lineage can be a state of mind.

If you are going to be an heiress, you can't have a normal name, unless you're British. All British people have plain names, and that works pretty well over there. But in America, you've got to have a name that stands out. I love my name. Paris is my favorite city. And Paris without the P is "heiress," isn't it? In sixth grade, people would make fun of me and call me "France" or "London." Well, I'm going to name my own daughter Paris! An heiress needs to have a glamorous — or a really cute — name. My sister Nicky's name is cute. An heiress's dog also needs to have a cute name. My teacup Chihuahua is named Tinkerbell, so she acts like a Tinkerbell. If you have a cute name, you will act cute. If you have a glam name, you will act glam. It's that simple. Future moms should make a note of that.

Pile makeup on and never, ever have a breakout. Perfect skin is a birthright, and it means you can never really take a bad photograph. No amount of junk food or Coca-Cola can change your skin. And if, God forbid, it does, have a great makeup artist standing by. It can't hurt.

Greasy chips or perfect crab cakes. Cotton candy or caviar. Fast food or fois gras. French fries or black-pepper shrimp from the Ivy in L.A. Cheesy junk or expensive cheese. Being an heiress is all about extremes.

Learn how to pose in an onslaught of flashing lights without blinking. (Note to celebrities: You can always improve.) Always know your best angle — for your body and your face — and work it. Study your own pictures and you'll figure it out.


Normal hours are for normal people. You never want to be normal. Anyone can be normal. How boring. I'm yawning.


Then do what you want. That way, no one ever gets mad at you. They get very confused, then blame it on themselves. If anyone confronts you, smile sweetly and act coyly. Particularly with guys. And bosses. Try not to have bosses if you can avoid them. Or have your manager deal with them.

Lose one all the time. That way, if you haven't called someone back, you can blame it on the lost phone. It's very important to get a new model the minute it comes out. Nokias, Ericksons, Motorolas — those are the coolest. Always have at least two numbers: a friend line and a business line. If I feel like avoiding a call, I answer my phone in a phony British accent and say, "Hello, Paris Hilton's line," or something like that. I do that if I'm expecting a call from a guy I've changed my mind about and I don't want to have dinner with him anymore. Every woman has the right to change her mind from time to time; therefore heiresses have more of a right.

This is particularly important if you're going to be photographed a lot, which I am. If you double up, people will think you have only one outfit — and that's annoying. And untrue.

That's for girls with no imagination who just buy what magazines tell them to buy. Look for the cool, unusual dress that no one else has the nerve to wear. Dare to be different. Dare to wear colors and prints. All the boring New York socialite girls wear black. Do you ever see a girl in a magazine wearing black? I don't think so. Don't run out and buy the bag of the moment or the dress of the moment. I like expensive things, but I like cheap things, too. I like anything that's cute and makes me happy. I haven't met too many clothes I didn't like — except black clothes.

If you're depressed, wear black. Black is for people who don't want to have fun with clothes and who are always hiding — in other words, depressed. No one with a truly great body wears black, trust me. And if you really want to stand out and be confident, wear white.

Invite everyone you know to come along. If there aren't enough hours in the day, don't worry, there will be. You live in a different time zone: Heiress Time.

It throws people off and makes them think you're "adorable," and less together than you really are.

Not boring. There's a huge difference.

in limited amounts, but only with your serious boyfriend, because that's exactly what someone with a famous family name is NOT supposed to do. It makes other boys think you're dangerous, so they will all want you, too. Guys like women they're a little afraid of. No, make that a lot afraid of.

It intimidates guys. If a guy does have the nerve to approach you when your bodyguard is around, you know he's got to be pretty fearless.

It looks like you've been in an exotic (i.e., expensive) place. It can never look fake, even if it is. Get the spray-on tan, so it doesn't get all over your clothes.

Everyone expects you to have the same hairstyle in every photo, and only dull people do that. Tell everyone you're wearing hair extensions even if you aren't, because they don't expect you to tell them.

It shows you have no nerve. Only drink real colas, caffeine-packed energy drinks, or Vitamin Water. Hate champagne, because that's what everyone expects you to love. Energy drinks are the best party drinks. You never get tired. You never have a hangover. And you can make fun of all the loaded people who think they're clever but are really acting stupid.

And sweaty guys who insist on kissing you when they come up to say hello. There's nothing worse than a sweaty guy who kisses you on both cheeks. Once is bad enough, but to have to go through it twice is really two times too much.

Always surprise people. That way, they will never get tired of you.

I went on Saturday Night Live soon after my name was in the headlines every day for something I wasn't too proud of, and which had really upset my family. On "Weekend Update" with Jimmy Fallon, the script had him asking me, "Is it hard to get a room in the Paris Hilton? Is it roomy?" and he wanted to cut it. But I wouldn't let him. No way. That was the funniest line. And I got the upper hand with the media the moment he said it on national TV. That's when it all clicked and things started to change. People knew I could laugh at myself, and that one bad incident was not going to make me lock myself in my room.